tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25845150978376835962024-02-20T13:17:05.579-08:00Living Breathing ProverbsLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-39742929698954969732010-03-11T06:05:00.000-08:002010-03-12T10:05:53.187-08:00DisciplineYo Yo My Mommy Friends!<br /> <br /><br />Ahhhh, Wednesday (pretend at least, it’s yesterday!!). How brilliant is it that we're 1/2 done with the week? Brilliant! I KNOW!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, Monday I wrote my weekly to-do list, and realized the one thing I was missing on it was "pray for my hubby." I actually had "pray for my friends" on it...but not Cliff. And yesterday I was so convicted by that omission, that I had to spend a good hour just ponder all the reasons I don't take him to the Lord in prayer. For more reasons than I can count, I didn't. Most were selfish, hard-hearted excuses. <br /> <br /><br />How many of us love our friends better than our hubbies? And I don't mean married love...but show love to our friends quicker than we show it to our hubbies, let alone our kids. In my Bible Study's small group class we had a people scavenger hunt and one of the things we had to find was "Who listens better to their girlfriends than their husbands." Let's just say I volunteered my name for that one to everyone in the class. <br /> <br /><br />But that was just another step of the Lord opening my eyes to the fact this is an area of weakness for me. Someday I'll dive into this with you, I'm sure there is some Proverb that will match this scenario. Until that fateful day, today, pray for your hubby. Pray for his protection, his heart, his mind, his success, his walk with the Lord. For when you surrender him at the Lord's feet, then God can move mountains in His life as well. <br /> <br /><br />Get out of God's way. You were not appointed by Him to be your hubby's intercessory. You are not his conscious (like Jiminy Cricket). Instead, you are to have a gentle, quiet spirit that doesn't overshadow and boss around her hubby, but is instead taking those words straight to the Lord in prayer. He'll change your hubby. I promise. <br /> <br /><br />I see this more and more each time I actually do this, and then I have a "duh" moment (which I think is opposite than an "aha" moment)! A "duh" moment is "I knew this, but didn't trust it...so I took things into my own hands, and then when that didn't work, I finally did what I knew in the first place, and that actually worked. DUH!" Trust me...I have a lot of "DUH" moments!! :) But that's part of growing! It's coming to grips that God knows better than I! Again, DUH! <br /> <br /><br />Pray for your hubby. Right now. Take a deep breath and pray for HIM. Don't pray for you and him...just him! <br /> <br /><br />Sidenote: When Cliff and I were first married, we used to go back and forth saying what we loved about each other (remember...newlyweds, haaa!). I would say, "I love the way you love me. The way you protect me. The way you make me laugh." He would look at me weird and say, "Okay, but what do you love about ME?" I was totally missing the mark, but didn't have the maturity to realize what the true mark was. "You're loving, you're strong, you're funny/witty." Those things are about him! So, when you take your hubby to pray don't say, "Help him to be nice to me." Pray: "God soften his heart as he relates to people today." Get out of your perspective, and pray for that heart of your hubby! He will be blessed! <br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 10 <br /><br /><br />17 People who accept discipline are on the pathway to life,<br /> but those who ignore correction will go astray. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Yesterday at Bible study, we were finishing up the "7 Things Christian Moms are Called to Do for their Children Straight from the Word." I love this topic because we moms can get so clouded, confused, confounded, and crazy when it comes to our kids! <br /> <br /><br />We do not have the same delusions when it comes to our hubbies; in fact, we swing to the opposite side of the spectrum and tend to be so critical about everything with our "loves of our lives." But when it comes to our babies, well, we would defend, save, go to battle even if it is wrong, for them. We are mama bears. And the enemies that threaten our cubs can even be our hubbies. Oh, we are funny! (And when I say "funny" I'm rolling my eyes and really want to say "lame, backwards, stunted.") <br /><br /> <br /><br />Our teacher dove head first into discipline and spent time comparing it to punishment, explaining the differences between the two. It was amazing! I loved every moment. I came home a much more balanced mother of two kids who I love dearly already...but then realized I am CALLED to do this for them. <br /> <br /><br />Discipline leads "to the pathway of life." The root of discipline is "disciple." The definition our teacher gave yesterday was "the teaching fear of the Lord, drawing the line consistently, lovingly, firmly." For discipline is not punishment. Discipline is done with an end goal in mind, based on the principle, done without personal emotion (if you're breathing hard and rolling your eyes, walk away for whatever you do in this state will be punishment not discipline), and is always after the HEART of your child. You are looking at the ROOT OF THE BEHAVIOR and basing your discipline upon what the Lord calls you, as a mom, to instill in your child. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Punishment is "punitive, goal is to put down, comes from a place of unrighteous anger that mostly stems from a personal hurt/offense, that will destroy a child's spirit and ignore his heart." Punishment is "I'm angry and you're going to get it." Often when punishing, the punishment will not fit the crime but it will be over-the-top. It will be you yelling, screaming, and then finally giving in because your child has worn you down. And don't pretend they don't know how to get to you...don't underestimate how SMART your children are! They know exactly what your buttons are so they can get out of discipline. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Here's a quick synopsis of the points. (As a former teacher, I’ve added a little behind each): <br /><br /> <br /><br />1. Discipline shows respect for both you and your child. You will handle the situation with respect for your child (no name calling, no "pulling back the rope" on ALL the things they've ever done wrong, like you do with your hubby, no threatening, no crazy threats). Punishment will cause your child to lose respect for you...and you will lose respect for yourself. <br /><br /> <br /><br />2. Discipline always fits the behavior and is determined without emotion even before the event occurs. When teaching we used to call this being "black and white." It's a simple cause-effect, input-output. "You chose to do this, and now I have to enforce this." It's not about me as the parent being offended. You can say, "It makes me sad that you don't make the right choices," but do not take it as a personal slap in the face or a sign of parenting failure. When you do, you become emotionally involved and your discipline will turn into punishment. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Punishment is based on the emotion that the parent feels (anger, sadness, etc.). It's irrational, it's loud, it's harsh (probably too harsh for the crime), and you will never be able to enforce it (which then makes your words null and void. Make sure when you're parenting that your yes be yes and your no be no. If your children do not see you follow through, they will no longer take you seriously and you will lose their respect.) <br /> <br /><br />I once had a parent ground her oldest child (6th grade) from all TV for 6 months. It was crazy! 6 months is impossible and is too long to be motivating for the child. She didn't care about TV by month 2 and didn't care what she wasn't watching, because now she was on the phone, computer, in her room with her door closed as the family watched TV. The punishment actually drover her further from the family isolated in her room (that happened to be downstairs right next to the family room where everyone was hanging out watching TV.) And rarely anything good comes from you kid being behind closed doors. The mom created a bigger problem than she had in the beginning. <br /> <br /><br />3. Discipline focuses on the bad choices of the CHILD. Punishment focuses on the bad kid. Discipline sees the event as just that, an event. Punishment starts adding up all the bad events and punishing the child every time for ALL the bad behavior they’ve ever done. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Now, discipline does become more harsh or severe with each infraction within the day. For example, you child hit her sibling (speaking from experience). The first discipline measure is a time out, the second is a longer time out and loss of dessert (Makena LOVES dessert), the third is…and you set these steps in your head with your hubby BEFORE the action happens. I say before because when your child chooses their behavior, you are not emotionally responding to them. The consequence is simply black and white. This is discipline. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But it is important to start fresh in the morning. New mercies ladies! Love on them. Sometimes they act out because their not getting enough good attention from you and they just want general attention…and at that point they’ll even take bad attention. It’s sad, but true. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Let me interject super quick: I just did a seminar for children’s ministries directors on classroom management and so much of this was wrapped up in my hour with them. But when you discipline (time-out, etc.), you need to sum it up in the end with a little talk…and if you are desiring to restore their heart, then the talk will look a little something like this: <br /><br /> <br /><br />1.Reaffirm your love for them first thing. “Makena, Mommy loves you with all her heart.” You do this because you want her to see your genuine care and it keeps their heart OPEN to hear your correction. <br />2.Tell her what she SHOULDN”T do…”We do not hit Keegan.”<br />3.Why she shouldn’t do it…”It is not kind or respectful, and God calls us to love one another. Hitting does not show love.”<br />4.Then what she SHOULD do instead…”When you are frustrated with Keegan, you need to use your words. If he doesn’t respond you need to leave the room and go do something else.” You have to replace the bad programmed behavior with something they SHOULD choose instead.<br />5.Then you need to have her apologize to you as the parent, “Sorry Mommy for not obeying” (because you’ve told her a thousand times not to hit).<br />6.And she needs to ask for forgiveness!!! “Please forgive me.” Do not skip this step!!! In our society we do not teach our kids the act of asking for forgiveness, and to me that is detrimental. How are they going to understand the need of asking God’s forgiveness if they can’t ask it of their mommy/daddy/sibling??<br />7.End with a hug. (Then because she harmed Keegan, I would make her go and apologize to him and ask for his forgiveness as well, and hug him.) You need the affection to reinforce the “I LOVE YOU” at the beginning of the talk! <br />8.This IS KEY: Never again mention this event again, unless they repeat it that day and you have to ratchet up the discipline. When you forgive, it’s DONE. Don’t say, “Do you remember when…” “I can’t believe you did…” etc. God doesn’t do that with us, so don’t do it with your child. If I ever brought it up, it would be said during the talk about infraction #2 that says, “I’m disappointed that we’re having a hard time today keeping hands to ourselves. Because this is the second time, you’ll be in time out for 8 minutes instead of 4.” But don’t rehash the past. The younger they are, the more they won’t even remember that they did it an hour prior. <br /> <br /><br />You may say, “But I only have a 15 month old.” And I would first ask, “Does your 15-month-old need discipline?” (And then I would be begging you inside my head to answer, “YES!!”) And if so through time-outs (or whatever), you can still do this process. I taught Makena to sign “I’m sorry” and then her hug at the end was “please forgive me.” This will set them up to understand HOW to restore a relationship that their actions have broken!! <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br />4. Discipline is current. Punishment for today pulls back everything they’ve ever done (which means you haven’t forgiven them!!) As a mom you are called to give hope for the home! So give that hope in-between the discipline. <br /><br /> <br /><br />NOW, this does not mean we indulge, cater, keep our kids from hard work, because we want to give them hope. Nope. Our kids need to learn responsibility, hard work, what it means to work for something because that’s what they will need to be successful in life. <br /><br /> <br /><br />If you have a hard time determining what behaviors to discipline for, just put your child’s action into the context of an adult. Ex: My 25-year-old hit his coworker in the head = Assault/battery = Jail. Okay, discipline for that. My 25-year-old just told his boss to shove it for no reason = fired from his job = moving back in with mom and dad. My 25-year-old got so angry he threw his chair across the room = damage to the chair/room = reputation is now ruined. My 25-year-old purposely disobeyed his boss = disciplined at work (loss of hours, etc.), but throws a fit because the boss took away his “right” to work (which is a privilege not a right, but we’ve taught them through not disciplining that they have a RIGHT…this is known as entitlement. I’m entitled to “this” because I “am”, not because I deserve or earned it.) = fired. <br /><br /> <br /><br />If you find the 25-year-old behavior ridiculous, then start disciplining your 2-year-old. Set the standards. Raise the bar. Children are soooo smart and sooooo capable. We, as adults, do NOT give them enough credit. Makena knows at 4 when she has a bad attitude and gets a time-out for it. She knows what it means to soften her heart. Do not underestimate their ability to learn and understand the social contexts of discipline. The early you start, the easier it will be to mold them. If you do nothing for the first 3 years, and then want to pick up with discipline in their 4th year of life, you will fight a LOOOONG hard battle. (And if you don’t discipline in the elementary years, kiss the whole, “I’ll then discipline in junior and senior high.” Your kids will balk at you and rebel. Promise!!) <br /><br /> <br /><br />On a total sidenote…there is a whole other side of parenting that will help you keep your kids from needing a ton of discipline. But that’s a whole other email. It’s all about preventative parenting. Discipline is reactive. They’ve done something, now you react. Let me know if you want those tid-bits. Maybe we’ll meet at my house?? J <br /><br /> <br /><br />5. Discipline is about teaching responsibility through choices. We have to allow our children age appropriate choices. We are not going to show up at their college dorm and ask what they’re wearing the next day and why they’re room is decorated a certain way. It’s not happening. Your whole goal of raising up these children is to mold them into independent, healthy, grounded, Christ-following, adults who understand the difference between right and wrong and the consequences of their actions. Period. If you talk with your hubby, I’m not sure he’d be on board with “well, my kids are co-dependent and I’d like them to live with us for the rest of our lives.” Ummm, NOOOOO!!! Right??? (Please say “Right!”) <br /><br /> <br /><br />This is what God calls us to do as mommies. No matter how cute, cuddly, funny, charming…or mean, intimidating, loud, tantruming they can be…we are called to be level-headed, to call it as it is, and to hold them to the standards that God has set for us in His Word. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The secret to parenting is this: whatever you want from them, be consistent in reinforcing it. Consistency is the key to change!!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />And then Ladies, we need to adhere ourselves to God’s discipline as well. We need to look at what God requires of us and actually do it. If there is an area we’re fighting Him on, we need to stop, give-up our “right” that we’re fighting for, surrender our heart and mind to Him, and allow Him to direct us. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Listen, we suffer enough natural consequences here on earth from our actions that I’m sure God is quite pleased that we keep feeling His squeeze through the natural cause-effect He set up in the first place! Haa! (See, she slammed the cupboard and the can of soup fell out and hit her toe…yeah for gravity!!) <br /><br /> <br /><br />But how does God discipline? In the manners described above. He is forgiving; He holds us accountable; He disciplines FOR OUR GOOD; He is impartial; He is unyielding; He understands but does not save us from the consequences; He is always after our good and our hearts; He is encouraging-redeeming-loving; and He is our Father. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Some verses to dig into: Ephesians 6:4, Hebrews 12:5-11, Proverbs 13:24, Proverbs 19:18, Proverbs 22:15, Proverbs 23:12-14, Proverbs 29:15-17. (Thanks Kim!) <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, today, try something new with your kids. Try breathing deep. Try loving them a tad more. Try holding them accountable. Try holding yourself accountable. I’m telling you, it is SOOOO worth every moment invested in this process. PROMISE!!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />If you have any random parenting questions, I’d love to answer them from my past experiences with my own kids…and with the 300 students I taught and tutored! I’ve seen it all…which I’m so grateful for because it has molded me into a better parent! (Again, I’m not the expert!! Just a fellow-mommy who has figured some things out…most of the time!! Hee!!) <br /><br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 10:17 People who accept discipline are on the pathway to life,<br /> but those who ignore correction will go astray. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Go and give your kids life. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Lots of love!!!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-62019233519254003362010-03-09T10:05:00.000-08:002010-03-12T10:07:08.481-08:00Blessed AssuranceGood Morning Sunshines!<br /> <br />Greetings from the Land of the Still Sleeping! I love getting up before everyone else (Cliff's already gone for work...call time was 6am!), sitting here with Pandora set on Matt Redman (last night it was Jeremy Camp), hearing the heater pop on (the best!!), and anticipating my coffee to finish brewing. There is silence. There is peace. There is wonder despite sitting here in pjs with hair going everywhere! And I love that! <br /> <br />For to have Him as the first and last thoughts of my day is truly amazing! The peace that puts you to sleep, and the peace that you wake up to is undeniable. And it's the peace that transcends the muck of your life. It's the peace that tells you to be patient, He is working. It's the peace that tells you to stop worrying, He is in control. It's the peace that tells you to stop manipulating, He will see to it that your heart is redeemed and along the way, those hearts closest to you. <br /> <br />I was really convicted last night as I was thinking about the junk in my life, and some difficult people whom I love with all my heart but who make life really difficult for themselves because they are not grounded in His worth and love. I can sit and think and try to figure them out and analyze the why behind their behavior. But what does any of that matter? If I'm not on my knees in prayer and handing them straight over to the Lord, then how do I expect to get out of the way and allow Him to work? No wonder the problems are on-going! <br /> <br />And let me offer a slight warning: just because we lay people of the feet of Him who can save all things, it does not mean they will change. But He will change your heart and your perspective in dealing with those people. Do not expect God to change other people, think of that as a bonus gift for coming to Him! But expect Him to change YOU. Come expectant!<br /> <br />The kids and I watched "Evan Almighty,” which I find really funny and cute. Morgan Freeman’s character “God” ends up waiting on Evan’s wife in a restaurant and says this little tid-bit that caused me to wonder: “If you pray and ask God for more patience, does He give you more patience or does He give you more circumstances that will test your patience? If you pray for more courage, does He give you more courage or does He give you circumstances that need courage?” <br /> <br />I thought about that for a long time. Psalm 138:3 “In the day when I cried out, You answered me, And made me bold with strength in my soul.” God doesn’t rescue us from all problems. He doesn’t wave His magic wand and declare all pain and suffering gone. Instead He carries us through. Think of the “Footprints” poem about Jesus carrying the author in the times where only one set of footprints is seen in the sand. (And the author was convinced that he was alone, and God had abandoned him.) He grants us the strength to endure (Is. 40:31) and the more we abide IN Him, the more our hearts are blessed (John 15:7). An answer to prayer may be slow (Luke 18:7, Ps 40:1); it may be different than we expected (2 Cor. 12:8-9); and it may not fix the problem, but fix you (James 5:16). But you knew that when you put Him in charge of your life, that you released all your control, reservations, and needs into His omniscient being. <br /> <br />Jeremiah 29:12-13 “Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.” <br /> <br />Just a rabbit trail I went down. <br /> <br /> <br />Proverbs 9 <br />Proverbs 9:10 “Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Knowledge of the Holy One results in understanding.” <br /> <br /><br />I love this verse because the more we dig ourselves into His Word, the more we understand His wisdom, His infinite love, His enduring strength, and His desire to bring us closer to Him. When we give our hearts to the Lord for the first time and receive salvation, it is just the beginning of our faith journey navigated by Him. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Let me compare our faith walk to marriage. When you said your “I do’s,” you became “wife.” You were “saved” from the single life, filled with frozen dinners, messy beds, and endless bad dates! You head home with your “hubby” (who was just awarded his title as well), and forget to work on your marriage. You ARE married, why do you need to continue to work on it? You reached and achieved “Happily Ever After.” For all love stories in fairy tales or the movies end when the people fall in love, or get married. Some of them will jump ahead to when the couple has kids…causing all us women folk to “oohhhh” and “ahhhh” as tears well up in our eyes. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But the reality of a marriage and the true meaning of that marriage relationship is realized days, months, years after the vows are exchanged. If a movie actually devled into a marriage, how many would be considered a “love story”? Probably not many. We call those “real” stories dramas! (Sidenote: If you want to see a real story of marriage, rent The Story of Us with Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfieffer.) <br /><br /> <br /><br />For ladies, without work, our marriage is just a functional, practical union between two consenting people who are only looking to own the title…not BE the title. We will clinically cohabitate, and probably do so not so happily. And in the end, our marriage will be an empty shell of what could be. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As part of the journey of marriage that begins at the exchanging of vows and rings comes the understanding that the wedding is just the tip of the iceberg. For it's truly about getting to know your hubby, and walking the walk of the relationship. And the more you invest in understanding your hubby- what makes him tick, what ticks him off, what goes on in that busy head of his- the more accurate you will see him and his actions. You will be able to respond to him on the basis of what is REAL, not what you perceive, because you KNOW him. You are in conversation with him. You are real with him. And he knows you intimately. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Not unlike our faith walk with the Lord. <br /><br /> <br /><br />We can give our hearts to the Lord, but then forget in the busy-ness of life to work out our faith in our daily doings. In the end, our faith will be a shell. "Christian" will be a title we hold, but the fruit of a true growing faith will not be ours. <br /><br /> <br /><br />For if accepting Him is only about being granted eternity in heaven, then we’re missing the intense journey where He will mold us, fill us, and use us beyond our wildest dreams. Yes, eternal life is the result of salvation. It is the sweet gift from His heart to ours. But working out faith on earth, sanctifying our hearts and minds in His love and time requires a constant surrendering of our own understanding and will to His. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The more we cling to His character and learn His knowledge daily, the more wisdom and understanding we will gain in our own lives. We will see reality though His reality. We will be open to the wild and crazy things He calls us to do. We will be teachable, moldable, willing, and gentle. And despite the storms that swirl around us, we KNOW His character, His truth, His Word which will ground us to His truth. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Sometime today consider having a conversation with the Lord. Be real. Be honest. Be YOU. (PS…He already knows you, so you can drop the façade! Promise!) But begin that relationship with the Lord. You’ve taken the first step and are a believer, but every day keep taking steps towards Him. For this is how we grow…how we become better…wives, moms, friends, servants of the King of Kings to whom all eternity belongs. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As I was writing this, my Pandora station divinely picked the following Third Day version of “Blessed Assurance.” I loved it, and wanted to copy the lyrics below: <br /><br /> <br /><br />Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine <br /><br />Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine <br /><br />Heir of salvation, Purchase of God <br /><br />Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood. <br /><br /> <br /><br />This is my story, this is my song. <br /><br />Praising my Savior all the day long. <br /><br />This is my story, this is my song. <br /><br />Praising my Savior all the day long. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Perfect submission, all is at rest <br /><br />I in my Savior am happy and blessed <br /><br />Watching and waiting, looking above <br /><br />Filled with His goodness, lost in His love. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Amen!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Love you mamas! I hope you had an amazing weekend! <br /> <br />Here’s to digging deep and not being satisfied in our walk with Him.<br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-87039877189413540302010-03-08T10:07:00.000-08:002010-03-12T10:09:19.244-08:00My OscarGood Afternoon Girls! <br /> <br />Happy Monday, Happy March, Happy Moms! <br /> <br /><br />Here's to living a better week than last week! <br /> <br /><br />I got sucked in last night watching the Oscars. I normally don't give in, but somehow, this year, I did. Sometimes I find the awards shows (and I do mean show(s) for how many awards did Sandra Bullock get in the past 2 months??) full of pomp and circumstance, full of gloating and self-toting, and it's just exhausting to see everyone dressed to the nines and to look down and "admire" my leggings. <br /><br /> <br /><br />I totally understand that above all awards, this is the big kahuna to win. This basically secures your position in Hollywood history, and gives job security (unless you're Mickey Rourke) until your death. You will be interviewed by Oprah. You will get a star on Hollywood Blvd. You will be mourned with candlelight vigils near every location that meant something in your life after you pass. And most importantly, that little statue sitting on your mantle will stare back at you for as long as you shall live. (PS...Oscars collect dust just as quickly as anything else in your home.) <br /><br /> <br /><br />As much as I would love to be awarded the Oscar by the votes of mommywood, wifewood, or housewood, I understand that those awards are for a moment in time...not for ALL time. <br /> <br /><br />But wisdom- a wise heart...now, that's an award I'd love to win daily. Let's just call it the Wise Heart! <br /><br /> <br /><br />In Proverbs 8, Wisdom speaks to us: <br /> <br />Proverbs 8:18-21 Riches (wealth) and honor (glory, dignity) are with me; yea, durable (handed-forward, enduring, valuable, surpassing) riches (substance) and righteousness. 19 My fruit is better than gold, yea, than fine gold; and my revenue (gain) than choice silver. 20 I lead in the way of righteousness, in the midst of the paths of judgment: 21 That I may cause those that love me to inherit (acquire, possess) substance (existence); and I will fill their treasures (storehouses). <br /> <br /><br />(The words in parentheses are synonyms from the Hebrew roots of each of the words in the KJV version.) <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, Sandra Bullock may have an Oscar, but I have my Wise Heart, and this is why I win in the end. <br /> <br /><br />1. Oscars are won by a person pretending they are someone else. It is their interpretation of who someone else is. They are not themselves. They are the epitome of someone wearing a facade, sometimes so deeply as to not leave that fake persona for the entire length of filming (method actors). In fact, it seems that the more submersed they are in a character, the better they are. <br /><br /> <br /><br />My Wise Heart is "won" by living out my life authentically as me. I am in the trenches with my heart and soul...my mind, my thoughts. There is nowhere to run from who I am, whether good or bad. I can put on a facade, but in the end, in the silence, when I'm alone, I am me. And in that authenticity, God can mold ME into the daughter of His that He wants me to be. For He has this amazing plan for my life that fits perfectly in His big picture. I may think it’s fleeting, like a movie that ends abruptly, but He thinks my life is a masterpiece…and my performance is for Him. <br /><br /> <br /><br />2. An Oscar is won for one performance. All actors start somewhere (remember George Clooney on Facts of Life??), and to be finally acknowledged is like finding that needle in a haystack. Nobody can predict that when they pick up a script that someday that ONE performance in that ONE film with that ONE director telling that ONE story would be the “best.” The odds are more against you winning an Oscar than scoring big in Vegas. And yet, by a “fluke” you MAY win an Oscar. <br /> <br /><br />However, my Wise Heart is a culmination of a life-long performance where nothing goes unnoticed by the King of Kings. Every performance, every role, every day, every moment, every relationship is an opportunity for my wise heart to burst forth and grow. It’s not like finding a needle in a haystack; it’s like finding the sun in a clear, blue sky. It is guaranteed when we turn our face to His. We are guaranteed to grow in His wisdom as we cultivate the garden of our heart. Our wise heart is not the result of a chance happening; it is a gift from Him and the direct result of digging deep in His Word and applying it throughout our lives. <br /> <br /><br />3. Once you are awarded an Oscar, is there anything really that will top that in your profession? Is the only way from there, down? Can you get any better than best? Well, I suppose Meryl Streep has answered that over and over again, but I am just curious. If you’ve “arrived,” then where do you go from there? For in Hollywood, when you think you’ve arrived, you become complacent and wake up 5 years later broke and on Celebrity Rehab or Celebrity Apprentice. (Okay, yes, I’m intrigued by reality shows.) And you can never, ever become comfortable, even though you’re the best…at least for that year. (And what if all the movies that year stunk, and you were actually the best of the worst?? Just a thought.) <br /><br /> <br /><br />However, my Wise Heart will never "arrive." It will never reach the “best” and I happen to love that. For when we think we’ve arrived and sit in our self-proclaimed "bestness", is when we turn our back on our Lord, and rely on our own strength…and wake up 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 months, 5 years later with a mess on our hands. The severity depends on the length we’ve been away from Him. My success, my existence, my "substance" (v.21) is due to Him! And that is what causes me to continue to strive, reach, stretch, and grow, for His approval and blessings. Ladies, when your teachers preached the good in being "life-long learners," this is what they were talking about. Most likely they were not referring to faith, but in what better area to be life-long learners than at the feet of our Lord? <br /><br /> <br /><br />4. An Oscar guarantees the winner glory for the night, maybe for the month, maybe for the next year…but after a year has past and they have to announce the next winner, their reign of “bestness” is over. For someone has replaced them. The glory fades as the newest, more trendy, more artsy, more gutsy, more bizarre roles are played. Soon you will be known as “that actress who won some award years ago for some role that can’t be recalled.” Try to remember the best actress from 5 years ago, let alone supporting actress. It just doesn’t happen. For the Oscar has no bearing on life itself. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And yet, my Wise Heart gives glory to Him for my entire existence. It's not just glory on the night I was saved, in the nights my marriage was saved, in the nights He rescues me from the pit of despair, but in all the nights, mornings, noons, evenings in-between. Forever my heart will be what defines me…not what I once earned or achieved, but what I am earning and achieving in the present. For He has my future held tightly in His hands. The glory, honor, dignity (v.18) of my Wise Heart is based on Him and due to Him, not on what is most trendy or most moving. It’s not due to how far out of my comfort zone I venture, but due to Him stretching me to places never imagined before! This glory, mamas, lasts a lifetime…and will go and on and on and on as we influence the generation that proceeds us, in our children, and their children. <br /><br /> <br /><br />5. And P.S., the Oscar is just an object. I know the recipients carry it around the first night as if it were their fifth appendage...an extension of their body...a new accessory...a new member of the family! HAA!! I watched Jeff Bridges’ backstage address to the press, waiving his arms in excitement, one hand holding the Oscar, and the other holding loosely to a tall glass of champagne. The only thing I focused on was the glass wondering at which point some liquid would bounce out of it! Forget what he was saying...the anticipation of the liquid in the glass was much more entertaining. But all of a sudden, the Oscar made him important. It made him an expert. It made his career. It made his wife's career spent indulging his endless travels, horrendous schedules, and lack of time with the family. That Oscar gave him validity. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But in the end of time, it will be my Wise Heart that will give my life validity. It is the object that proves throughout my life, who I stand for, what I stand for, and why I stand for Him. My heart, never away from my body (and without it, I would be clinically dead), defines me. I have the opportunity to develop my heart, to ground it in Him, and yet to allow it to soar on the wings of eagles. It is not about the verbal cacophony that I spout on and on, for it's my walk that proves my Wise Heart. So my worth is wrapped up in the wisdom that is greater than gold, silver (v.19), and will fill my existence and my treasures (v.21). <br /><br /> <br /><br />Ladies, how amazing is that? I would much rather win a Wise Heart. For in the end, when we stand before the Lord, we won’t have anything EXCEPT our hearts. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Here’s to living every day as if a performance for one, the One who created you to be exactly where He has you. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Lots of love!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-51491074379594031702010-03-04T17:20:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:21:39.905-08:00In Pursuit**Prologue: Pretend this is Thursday. Do it just for me…because you love me and know that if everything went according to plan that it would have been sent on Thursday! J <br /><br /> <br /><br />Hey Mamas! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Happy Thursday! We're almost there...almost to the weekend. And what a lovely thought that is! <br /><br /> <br /><br />I always feel some sort of relief when we pass Wednesday...like "it's all downhill from here." Just coast to the finish line. It's not true, 48 hours requires a lot more than coasting, but maybe it's just the mental reprieve that the end is near that sends joyous shivers down my spine! Let's just say I'd be a HORRIBLE marathon runner, for endurance is not my thing! <br /><br /> <br /><br />I figured out the other day why I feel so scattered throughout the day: we, moms, work split shifts. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Back in my lifeguarding days pre-Cliff, I used to hate getting split shifts...come in the morning, go home for a little while, come back in the afternoon, then finally go home. It was mentally exhausting for me because I love to get everything done in ONE FELL SWOOP. I'm the girl talking on the phone, folding laundry, silently scolding a child, running to grab the coffee from the beeping microwave (because I didn't have time to drink it hot from the coffee maker), and taking food out of the freezer for dinner all in a 5 minute period. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But as moms, our time is split, isn't it? Here's my schedule: <br /><br /> <br /><br />7-8:30am kids up, fed, out the door (if school aged), <br /><br />8:30-11:15 FREE ("Ahhhh," sing the angels)...or if your kiddos take a morning nap (or have room time...and if you don't know what that is, well, let me introduce you to a concept that will save your sanity!! Email me and I'll be specific.) <br /><br />11:15-4:00 Lunch, chores, playdates, play, pick-up again, homework, snacks, discipline, etc. <br /><br />4-5:30 FREE Kids in rooms for naps/book time <br /><br />5:30-8:15 Dinner, clean up, baths, books, bed <br /><br />8:15 FREE! Kids in bed! <br /><br /> <br /><br />See? A split shift! On, then off, on, then off again, on, then die. And in those time constraints it's hard to keep your endurance going! Your routine (and even if you think you don't have a routine, you do. We humans are creatures of habit!) may vary. Your free time maybe less...or more depending on the ages of your children, but the concept is the same. It takes more energy to start after you've stopped (the law of inertia for those 8th grade science students!!). And it is exhausting, admittedly! <br /><br /> <br /><br />But it's much like the spiritual journey that we're on as women. Close to God, pull away, draw near to Him, stumble and sin, humbly present self before Him, forget He's there, and on and on it goes. I think at certain points, if we're really dialed into our hearts and souls, it becomes exhausting...to work so hard to be grounded in Him, and then to lose it...get back on your feet and cling to the cross, and then fall away again. The more we know of Him and what He requires, the more sensitive our hearts become to the failure of our behavior and thoughts. <br /><br /> <br /><br />I would challenge you, however, to not see split shifts in our walk as a bad thing whatsoever, just as I've switched my thinking about split shifts in my daily routine. For spiritual sanity is gained in the moments spent alone. Our saving grace, our point of balance comes in those moments when we are relieved from our earthly duties and can dive into Him and His word. Those "free" shifts, when we can stop doing and start hearing Him, is worth the extra effort is takes to begin again. For it is in those free moments that He refreshes, restores, rejuvenates, and re-centers us in His will. And the more we check in with Him throughout our day, the less damage we do in the time that we're "on." (Ex: after 5 days, I'd have a lot of repenting to do...after 3 hours not so much...and I can probably right some relationships that were wronged without letting it go on and on.) <br /><br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 4 <br /><br /><br />7 Getting wisdom is the most important thing you can do!<br /> And whatever else you do, get good judgment.<br /> <br /><br />There’s a part of me that laughs as I’ve gone to the grocery store for the third time this week that wisdom was definitely on my list to buy. My infamous weekly to-do list I email myself every Sunday night does not include “get wisdom.” Sure it has “daily devotions, be kind, go to Bible study” on it, but how many times do I purposefully seek out wisdom and then actually apply it? Not enough. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Let’s get real just for a minute. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Thanks to Chris Allen (and I suppose I should thank American Idol), who sings the song “Live Like You’re Dying,” we are reminded that there are 86,400 seconds in a day. In that massive amount of time, we can choose to fill our mind with our own understanding, our own emotions, our own motives…or we can turn our back on what has always been, and turn our face, our mind, heart, and soul towards the One who calls us to be so much more than we are. <br /><br /> <br /><br />For, ladies, we are dying. We are in the process of dying from the moment we’re birthed. The time on this earth is finite. It is fleeting. It is but a speck of dust flying through the winds of eternal time. When you embrace your mortality, that race for wisdom becomes more and more desperate and driving. For we are called to live for Him. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Ladies…we have a family to change, a marriage to change, children to change, a home to change, and a world to change…for Him. He will enable you to do things on His account that you would never imagine possible. You will achieve things, impact people, and endure circumstances unimaginable because you posses a peace you’ve never experienced before. For the wisdom that comes from Him is truth. It’s not the wisdom for the time, or the culture. It just is. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And that wisdom is readily available in His Word. Everything in life becomes clearer, your perspective of yourself changes, and He will open your eyes to things He wants you to change. View everything, through the Word of God. Use it as your measuring stick for your behavior, your words, and your thoughts. Use it as the filter for what is truth in this world. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As I write this at Panera Bread, I am watching a women read The Secret, that infamous book toted by Oprah as her epiphany to the “unleashing” the power of the universe. The bottom line of the book is this: if you think something, the universe will bring it back to you tenfold. If you think negative, then you will receive negative. If you think great, positive things, then the universe will bring those back to you. All about the “energy” you put out, being echoed back on you and your circumstances. This lady, was reading, and then writing frantically in her little notebook, I can only assume about the energy she’s putting out there in the universe. For she’s seeking a wisdom that will explain her existence, her purpose, and her future. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Across the way, I am sitting with my Bible in my lap and find it so completely ironic that here we are both seeking for wisdom, but hers will be fleeting, just as her life is. It will come and go as her thoughts do, and will not explain why bad things will happen to her despite her positive energy. I serve a God that loves me despite myself and what kind of energy I have (listen, in my world it’s not even positive or negative…it’s exhaustive or coffee-driven!! Haa!). I serve a God who is seeking after me, even when I may turn my back on Him. I serve a God not because I’m going to get something in return, but because my soul is filled by His glory. It’s not about me and my life here on earth, what I’m going to get, what I’m going to be spared from, what I’m going to be blessed by. It’s about Him and the eternal life that He so freely gives. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And I prayed for her because the secret is that God loves her…and is waiting for her to turn to Him. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And so, in the split shifts of our day, our lives, our emotions, pause to fill up with wisdom. Drink in that wisdom straight from His Word…straight from the source. Seek after it as you would if your child was suddenly lost. For wisdom is faith in internal application and then demonstrated in our active thoughts, words, and actions which shows the fruit of His transforming power over our hearts. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Here’s to our pursuit of Him and His wisdom!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Lots of love, ladies! <br /><br /> <br /><br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-32605633046392779572010-03-01T17:19:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:20:35.676-08:00Tending The GardenMarch 1st! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Can you believe it? Where did February go?? <br /><br /> <br /><br />In my life, February passed by under an abnormally large amount of major events. To look at my calendar is to notice my pen bled during February. So, it flew! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Many of you had major events happen in February...babies born, pregnancies discovered, marriages strengthened, marriages weakened, jobs earned, jobs lost, kids honored, kids disciplined, health issues, parent issues, and the list goes on and on. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And yet, we persevere. No matter how our life changes, our God is unchangeable. What we knew about Him yesterday is what He is today and will be tomorrow. In a world that is changing at a rapid pace, I find the knowledge that I base my life on a God who is NOT changing, very comforting. For the God I read about every day, is the God you are reading about,...He is the same God I worship daily, who sustains me, who calls me to live my life faithful each day, and who is faithful to complete my being day in and day out. We do not stand on sifting sands...but on a rock of Him. Ladies! Rejoice! For everything around us can be shifting and send us into shock, but if He is the rock beneath our feet, nothing can rattle us. <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, here we are embarking on a whole new month! Time to do an inventory! How are you doing on your New Year's Resolutions? Do they need revising? Maybe touch them up? <br /><br /> <br /><br />Refresh in your mind what your long-term goals are this year, and then get specific and write 3 steps on how you are going to achieve each one. I think our own personal growth can get lost in the shuffle of our families and our duties as wife, mom, homemaker, friend, etc. But I want you to look back on 2010 as a year of growth. A year that changed your life forever...not based on circumstances, but based on what God has taught you along the way and what you were able to conquer through His strength. <br /><br /> <br /><br />If you didn't write any resolutions, it's never, ever too late! Take 5 minutes today and explore what you would love to accomplish in the next 10 months! If you want more accountability, email me your resolutions, and every month I will forward back the same email to check-in with what you said 30 days prior. Totally confidential. If you don't want me to read it, just put DO NOT READ in the subject of the email, and I will let it sit in a folder until April 1st. No problem! <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, here we go! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 1: <br /><br /> <br /><br />Solomon begins writing Proverbs with general advice to young people. The first few chapters are his attempts at selling people on why proverbs are so important; why proverbs must sink through our hearts and minds to transform us from the inside out. He introduces the purpose in the following verses: <br /><br /> <br /><br />2 Their purpose is to teach people wisdom and discipline,<br /> to help them understand the insights of the wise.<br />3 Their purpose is to teach people to live disciplined and successful lives,<br /> to help them do what is right, just, and fair.<br />4 These proverbs will give insight to the simple,<br /> knowledge and discernment to the young. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As someone who loves an outline, Solomon is giving it to us. Not only does he begin with the purpose of Proverbs (v. 1-7), but he continues with the importance of gaining wisdom (v. 8-19), and introduces the personification of wisdom (v. 20-33). It's a perfect succession...it flows, it makes sense, and it hits us smack in the middle of our hearts. We know what we will hear if we read Proverbs. The overview of Proverbs readies our heart for the specifics. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But as we've been looking closely at Proverbs, I loved these next two verses, because, girls, this is what we have been doing during the past two months! <br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 1:5-6 Let those who are wise listen to these proverbs and become even wiser.<br /> And let those who understand receive guidance<br />6 by exploring the depth of meaning in these proverbs, parables,<br /> the wise sayings, and riddles. <br /><br /> <br /><br />It is one thing to simply read Proverbs, say "that's nice," and put the Bible away and continue on your simple way. It is another to look at them inside and out, digging deep at what they look like and what they don't look like, allowing your head to wrap around the tiny nugget that is amazing in the life that it gives, and truly adding it to your heart. It's the difference between eating empty calories, those that don't mean anything to your body, except adding fat...and eating filling calories, those that will fill you up, keep your organs functioning, your heart pumping, and oxygen to your brain. Vital versus excessive. Necessary versus fluff. "I want" versus "I need." <br /><br /> <br /><br />What keeps us from exploring Proverbs deeper? What stops us from getting down and dirty with the Word of God? What keeps us from pulling those weeds, laying down the fertilizer, and planting new seeds on fresh soil? <br /> <br /><br />The work: Ladies, it is work. Reading about changing your life is so much easier than actually changing your life. Filtering your thoughts is so much easier to think about and wish for than actually pausing and filtering. I'm one that weighs everything against the energy output for the result that's going to come from my efforts. Blame it on my desire to be super efficient, or to take multi-tasking to the next level...neurotic insanity! But the work it takes to dedicate every thought, word, deed, motive, intention is exhausting. <br /> <br /><br />You can even own every book about how to make a beautiful garden, but never do the work...well, you will NOT have a beautiful garden! <br /> <br /><br />And likewise, we must see work as a vital piece of our growth as a Christ-follower. And who's afraid of work? We all get down and dirty with our kids, our homes, our friends and their hearts, so why not our own hearts and our own spiritual walks with the Lord? For nothing worthwhile is gained without work. <br /> <br /><br />The dirt: It's messy. Thinking about going into my backyard and getting in the dirt is so unappealing. I hate getting dirt caked in my fingernails (and freak out slightly when I think about what's in the soil). I hate choosing clothes and shoes that I don't mind getting dirty, almost like choosing which clothes and shoes I'm marching to the guillotine. And I would much rather have the beautiful garden without getting in the dirt. But we all know that's impossible unless I hire gardeners to do the job for me. And that's just NOT in the budget. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Beauty without getting dirty is not possible. Tending to the weed and the vitality of our hearts is a dirty job. Sin is mucky and dirty. It's not pretty, our nails will get dirty, but in the end, the clean slate is beautiful. The refining, the weeding out, the pruning, the watering, the getting dirty is what God calls us to do in the process of sanctification. This is the "by exploring the depth of meaning" (v. 6a) that God calls us to do. To get down and dirty, with His Word and our hearts. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The time: I am famous for overestimating my ability to finish a task in a certain amount of time. I think I can whip up dinner, and an hour later with a sink full of dishes, I finish. I think I can "throw" together a workshop I'm presenting, and finally at 3:45am give up, let go of my perfectionist tendencies, and go to bed. I want the body I had at 25 years old, but really don't have time to work that out. I want the beautiful garden, but I don't have (and truthfully don't want) the time to devote to the hideous project. And, the weighing of effort versus the outcome always plays in the back of my head. <br /><br /> <br /><br />However, growing our hearts into a beautiful garden for Him and through Him is time-consuming. It is all encompassing. It requires time to dig into His Word, analyze it, look at it forward and backward, and then meditate on it, and allow it to seep through every fiber of your mind and heart. It is time consuming, but it is life-giving. Is it worth it to find 15 minutes in your busy day? Is it worth it to miss the first monologue of Live with Kelly and Regis? Is it worth more than gold and silver? For ladies, our hearts determine everything we do...and when we change them, it affects all we do! It IS worth it! Promise! <br /> <br /><br />The endless tending and caring of it: Let's face it...give your manicured garden 3 weeks and you'll need to be back out there weeding and tending to your garden. You'll need to water daily and pay attention to the grass's absorption rate and reevaluate if you're watering too much or not enough. You'll need to inspect it. You'll need to get dirty again and again. You'll need to sacrifice more clothes, more shoes, more time to maintain the beauty of your garden. However, the catch is the more frequently you tend to your garden the less you will have to do each time. <br /><br /> <br /><br />This is the same as our "heart care." We must tend to it daily. We must constantly reevaluate our growth, our intake (or lack thereof), our growth, our weeds. And we must then work to gain a balance, to prune, to dig up the roots of the weeds. Left unattended, no matter how well-meaning, your heart will have weeds in it. If we do not allow the Word of God transform our hearts and cut out the bad seeds, then we are just dreaming of a pretty heart and will never achieve it. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Sidenote: we will never have a weed-free heart. That is the curse of sin in a fallen world. However, working towards sanctification brings light and life to those around us. You will find after some intense weeding for periods of time, you will become a natural at it. You will spot the weeds from yards away, and you will spot them early because your eye is now trained. And you will know exactly what you need from Him (which He already knows for you...it's that little detail of being omniscient!!) when circumstances arise. So, perfection is NOT the goal. It's just not possible. However, being more aware today than yesterday is the goal the Lord has set before you: "...those who are wise listen to these proverbs and become even wiser." (v.5)<br /> <br /><br />The Thanklessness: If I was being totally honest with you, if I spent 8 hours in my garden and it finally was looking decent, I would want to invite my whole neighborhood into my backyard to admire my work and give me accolades. It's a sick validation that I thrive on, but I am motivated at times by what others think of my work, and therefore think of me. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And yet, tending to our backyard...like our hearts...is a private matter. It is a matter between the Lord and myself. The changes that come about are monumental to me, but small or even unnoticeable in what other's can see. But again, whose approval matters in this journey of sanctification? The Lord's. Faith is a private relationship between you and the Lord...and all the ins and outs of that relationship are only known to you and Him. And that is precious! <br /><br /> <br /><br />(Please note I'm NOT saying live your faith in isolation, or never get outside opinions or guidance in HOW to live out your faith in this world. God has placed people and circumstances in our paths to continue to mold us and sanctify us for His glory.) <br /><br />**************** <br /><br /> <br /><br />So look back over your March goals. What weeds do you need to get rid of? What work do you need to do? What do you need to sacrifice for the sake of the process? What's worth getting dirty for? <br /> <br /><br />For ladies, dirt always washes off! It's a temporary state that is easily remedied. For He cleanses us with His blood, with His love, and in His glory! <br /> <br /><br />One last tid-bit: I was reading in my Study Bible's notes as part of the introduction to Proverbs, and it says this: "What the book of Psalms is to prayer and devotional life, the book of Proverbs is to everyday life. Proverbs gives practical advice for effective living. This book is not just a collection of homey sayings; it contains deep spiritual insights drawn from experience. A proverb is a short, wise, easy-to-remember saying that calls a person to action. It doesn't argue about basic spiritual and moral beliefs; it assumes we already hold them. The book of Proverbs focuses on God- His character, works, and blessings- and it tells how we can live in close relationship to Him." <br /> <br /><br />That's where we are. We know the Lord. We know what He requires. Now we must DO it! We must work. We must get dirty. We must commit ourselves day in and day out. We must concentrate on ourselves and no one else. And then, our hearts will bloom. <br /> <br /><br />Love ladies!!Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-3266168438970823362010-02-22T17:18:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:19:35.307-08:00True FriendshipsGood early morning, ladies! <br /> <br />I hope you slept well, your kiddos slept well, and you woke up with a renewed sense of being! <br /> <br />Sometimes I hate sleep, only because I can get so much more done if I limit my time snoozing in bed! I'll admit that I see sleep as a necessary evil! Haaa! My sister-in-law however would argue that there is nothing better in the world than to sleep a good 12 to 14 hours. In her defense, she doesn't have any children, so I'll let her believe that sleep's her best friend. Hee! But I couldn't do that if I tried. I was never ever like that, even as a teen. (go back and make parallel to the paragraph below)<br /> <br />In the same token, I know that I have to spend time alone in the Word and with my Lord to feel equally refreshed! Sometimes its done out of a task that needs to be crossed off the list...and that's when I end my time with the Lord and immediately whip around and yell at my kids. For true devotions are spent when you devote your whole mind, heart, soul to be RENEWED by Him. Much like sleep is necessary for our bodies, so His Word is necessary for our hearts, minds, and souls. <br /> <br />Sometime today, curl up in the couch with a blanket, a cup of coffee, for a little uninterrupted time (notice I didn't say quiet, because in most of our homes, quiet is not possible) to dig deep in His Word. Take out the Proverbs of the day, read it, underline things that stand out to you, choose a verse to memorize, and pray over it as you commit it to memory. The fruit of that 10-15 minutes spent in His Word will amaze you. <br /> <br />I think so many of us reach the end of our day and wonder what we have to show for it except a string of blow-ups (whether aggressively or passive aggressively) creating emotional havoc. But more times than not, when we rest in His Word first, the atmosphere in our home is markedly more calm, peaceful, patient. For me, His Word has made more difference than a cup of coffee (how many of us make it a point to stop every morning at Starbucks but can't crack open our Bibles?), than a shower (I can yell equally as loud with clean hair as with dirty), than a clean home (this is just a facade that makes me feel as though I'm in control), than happy, compliant children (they're probably not happy nor compliant because I have crushed their spirits along the way); because the Word of God changes us from the inside out. It's not a supplemental vitamin we try to take daily, but instead we should see it as the main meal in order for our heart to find balance and His perspective. <br /> <br />Try it. And see what happens. See if your hubby notices. See if your home is more peaceful. See if your heart notices things that it never noticed before. See if you're more aware of His hand during your day. Dare to see things from His perspective; to breathe; breathe deep; let go of your human frailty; and to rise again in His strength. For we are to put off what is old, and put on what is new. (Scripture) That's my challenge for you and me today! <br /> <br />Proverbs 22<br /> <br />24 Don't befriend angry people<br /> or associate with hot-tempered people,<br />25 or you will learn to be like them<br /> and endanger your soul.<br /><br /> <br />I used to teach 6th grade in a private school in my pre-kids life, and I loved every moment of it! Some of you dread the time when you're kiddos are pre-teens, but let me assure you that sixth graders are a blast! Not only are the hilariously funny, but their brains are actually learning to think...not just because you told them to, but because they are genuinely trying to get a grasp on the world that is around them and their place in that world. I owe much of my wisdom to the parents' of my students, all of my parenting style to them (because I knew what children I wanted my kids to be like, and then peppered the mom with parenting questions...let's call it the "Schaumloeffel Institute of Parenting Research!" HAA!), and much of my sanity to those who have walked before me. (As a bit of a rabbit trail, let me say that I learned because my heart was open and I wanted the end result.) <br /> <br />One of the things I learned was the importance of friends and the parents' understanding of the influence of friends' in their children's lives. Some of my students were moving to public schools after 6th grade and parents would ask me how to keep their "little" ones from getting sucked into the vortex of worldliness. One of the most important things I would tell them was to know who were their child's friends. <br /> <br />Why? Because those friends have the ability to encourage your child on the right path or to derail them faster than anything. <br /> <br />As this verse 24-25 says, "if you hang out with corrupt people, you too will become corrupt, and it will ruin your soul" (paraphrased by me to take it to a broader concept). It's not just the angry, but the defiant, rebellious, depressed, withdrawn, self-labeled "social outcasts," arrogant, unyielding, disrespectful, unkind, and the unloving. Any of those can rub off on our babies, whatever their age, and it is our job to be the defender of our babies' hearts. <br /> <br />But what about our own friendships? What about the people we allow into the inner-courts of our hearts? What are they encouraging us to do? What traits of theirs are rubbing off on us? Is the friendship supporting your life's purpose? Are your choices encouraged by the friendship? Are you uplifted when you leave your friend? Or are you even more crabby, cranky, dissatisfied, negative, critical when you return home? <br /> <br />We may not be pre-teen sixth graders, but as women, our hearts are just as vulnerable to those we spend the most time with. For they are the ones who can keep us on track or derail us!<br /> <br />Proverbs 13:20 Walk with the wise and become wise;<br /> associate with fools and get in trouble.<br /> <br />Let's look closely at the typical "friends" we may have that suck the life we truly desire right out of us:<br /> <br />1. The Crab: <br /> <br />For this poor gal, everything is interpreted through the negative "glass is 1/2 empty" view. She gripes, complains, whines, and even throws tantrums because her life is not what she ever wanted. She's more busy pointing the finger at others in self-righteous blame, than to realize she can change everything. <br /> <br />You become friends with her because her sarcasm, at first, is funny and revealing. But the more you get to know her you realize the unhappiness and unrest is deep-seeded and toxic. You find yourself absorbing her cynicism, going home and being critical, noticing things that never bothered you before, being vocal when you know it is not productive, causing the strife in your home to be on the rise, which is directly counter-productive to what the Lord calls you to do. <br /> <br />If you think you will change her, you won't. But she will cloud your vision. <br /> <br />Ecclesiastes 7:9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, <br />for anger resides in the lap of fools. <br /><br /> <br />2. The Flirt:<br /> <br />This the woman, that if married, is quite unsatisfied and finds the attention with other men and in social circles that put her fidelity at risk falsely fulfilling. If not married, then she is constantly out and about, flirting, hooking-up, collecting men on her journey. She is most likely attractive, fun, and effervescent. You are drawn to her, just like everyone else, because of this, but what you soon realize is that all this bubbly flirtation is hiding a lonely heart. A heart that is not loved by anyone, not even herself. <br /> <br />To be with her, you must join her escapades. If you're not fun, she doesn't want to be with you. You'll be a downer to her state of euphoria. She will avoid having coffee with you in an intimate, get-down-to-the-heart conversation because she doesn't want to get down to the bottom of anything. She avoids as a defense mechanism. <br /> <br />But to put yourself in her world is dangerous. It can be exciting, thrilling, and even titillating, especially if you are living in your sweats, talking to 3-year-olds all day long, and then at war with your hubby when he gets home. The unhappiness can breed contempt for the life you are called to lead, and if you find yourself in a compromising situation in mixed company it can be too tempting to resist. <br /> <br />If you want to change her, you won't. But she will cause you to question your morals. <br /> <br />Proverbs 6:23-24 For their (father's instructions) command is a lamp<br /> and their instruction a light;<br />their corrective discipline<br /> is the way to life.<br />24It will keep you from the immoral woman,<br /> from the smooth tongue of a wayward wife.<br /><br /> <br />3. The Self-Absorbed: <br /> <br />This "friend" is really not a friend at all. She probably doesn't know what a true friend acts like or says, so she keeps it all about her. You will probably find yourself in the middle of a conversation you've said nothing but, "uh-huh" in response to everything she says. She doesn't care to know your heart, so she doesn't ask. This is a one-sided friendship, which by definition, isn't much of a friendship. <br /> <br />To continue the friendship, you must assume the role of listener, and not expect much else in response. In theory you will be her friend, but she will not be yours. For a friend listens, loves, and laughs with the other. If you want more of a reciprocal friendship, you will not find it here. And if you do want to say anything, be prepared to just interject any time she takes a breath...but don't expect her to respond to it. <br /> <br />In the end, this friendship will only remain on the surface. Nothing deep will be shared from her to you. You are simply her therapist; the kind of therapist that just listens and nods until the hour is up. Instead of being vitamin rich, this friendship is filled with empty calories. Time will be spent, but nothing will be gained. <br /> <br />If you think you will change her, you won't. Instead she will waste your time. <br /> <br />Proverbs 18:21 The tongue can bring death or life;<br /> those who love to talk will reap the consequences.<br /><br /> <br />4. The Depressed:<br /> <br />We are not talking about the depression, we may find ourselves in when we all go through sadness making our whole world blue. Temporary depression is part of the human condition when the trials of this world weighing heavily on our hearts. I'm also not talking about those clinically diagnosed with depression due to an imbalance of hormones in your body. This depression is very real. <br /> <br />Instead, the depressed friend is the one who is always depressed, no matter the joy and blessings occurring around her. She has allowed a temporary depression define her, for she is getting fed by how others are responding to her, and this gives her enough reason to CHOOSE to remain trapped. Everything is cause for a pity party, the "poor me...I have it so bad." Compare it to Eeyore from Winnie The Pooh, who goes through his whole life eating thistles and wagging his tail unenthusiastically only to swat away flies. <br /> <br />You will try to help this friend. We all do. We feel her pain; we think we're carrying her through, but in the end, she must come to grips with herself and the Lord. Ultimately, she will exhaust the string of sympathizing friends and end up alone, which is where her "come-to-Jesus" meeting is actually going to happen. <br /> <br />This person is craving answers for her problems that she is not willing to work out in her heart, mind, actions. So, really, she does not want to move out of the depression because the attention, sympathy, and love she receives in this state is fulfilling enough to her hurting heart. <br /> <br />I was given this advice from an older, wiser person: if a person comes to you for advice, then walks away without really grappling with it (thinking about it, trying it, refuting it...which will lead to the exposure of root issues), and then comes back for the same advice, do not waste your time. Redirect her to the previous conversation. Do not rehash. And do not continue to give her advice, for she is now manipulating you (and keeping the attention on herself). <br /> <br />If you think you will change her, you won't. Instead she will drain you. <br /> <br />Proverbs 13:4 Lazy people want much but get little,<br /> but those who work hard will prosper.<br /> <br />Proverbs 14:23 Work brings profit,<br /> but mere talk leads to poverty!<br /> <br />5. The Self-Indulgent:<br /> <br />This friend is able to indulge in everything life has to offer...a mani/pedi, dinners out, vacations, gifts, cars, clothes, and the list goes on. She doesn't have the normal perspective nor constraints on life, nor does she understand the limitations others must live under. She gets a babysitter when her hubby is hard at work, just so she can go out with her friends. She spends hours invested in molding and shaping her body, but no time creating deep relationships with anyone around her (hubby, kiddos, friends) except maybe with her personal trainer. <br /> <br />The truth is that in the self-indulgence, she's running away from pain and loneliness. A quick shopping fix will cure the heartache. If she refuses to cultivate deep friendships around her, then there is something she has to hide. All in all, this person is curing an aliment with temporary happiness caused by the things she does. <br /> <br />You will be her friend because she's fun and exciting. She may live the life you envy, spending without thinking about it because she's rich and able. But let me say that in the end richness does not come from money, but from the relationships we have with people. <br />This friendship will be shallow...but will cause you to look at your own life with disdain and a critical eye. You will become envious, dissatisfied, crabby at home, critical of your hubby, and convinced that money will be the answer to all your problems. <br /> <br />If you think you will change her, you won't. Instead she will monopolize you. <br /> <br />Proverbs 12:12 Thieves are jealous of each other's loot,<br /> but the godly are well rooted and bear their own fruit.<br /><br /> <br />6. The Perfect: <br /> <br />Sometimes I think this friend is one of the most appealing to us, especially if we are running around in Christian circles. Somehow we internalize the notion that if the Lord is the true Lord of our lives, then nothing bad will happen. We will marry the perfect man, who will provide the perfect salary to give us the perfect home to birth the perfect babies to be able to do all the perfect things you're "supposed to" with your perfect children. Everything is perfect. So, let's pop that bubble right now. <br /> <br />There is no such thing as perfect. Perfect does not exist on this side of heaven. Not even remotely close. The perfect friend who pretends she's living the perfect life is either naive to what is truly going on around her or so insecure about the imperfection that lies behind closed doors that the perfection is her facade. <br /> <br />You will be drawn to her because she's happy, go-lucky. She's fun...and perfect. And who doesn't want a perfect friend? But you will leave dissatisfied once again with your own life. You will convince yourself that the grass is truly greener on the other side. You will be the "what if" game...what if I didn't marry him, what if I didn't quit work, what if i didn't...and on and on the regret piles up. <br /> <br />Galatians 3:3 How foolish can you be? After starting your Christian lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort?<br /> <br />7. The Gossip:<br /> <br />This gal's purpose is to spread truths, half-truths, and non-truths about everyone else but herself. Do you realize gossips don't spread gossip about themselves? That would be against her whole reason behind gossiping. If you're talking about others, then you can't talk about yourself. And you can hide behind everyone else's indiscretions.<br /> <br />You will be friends with her because "inquiring minds want to know," right? Somehow, we women are drawn to know the inside track. We justify it as a "concern, prayer request, lesson learned from someone else's actions," but we can surround ourselves with it. We lose sight of our home, of our integrity, of the truth, of His truth. Gossip can destroy friendships, lives, reputations, futures, and faiths. <br /> <br />Proverbs 11:12-13 It is foolish to belittle one's neighbor;<br /> a sensible person keeps quiet.<br /><br />13 A gossip goes around telling secrets,<br /> but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.<br /> <br />***************<br /> <br />Now, please do not hear me say "surround yourself with Christian friends who shouldn't do these things to you," for we are called to this world to be His light. We are called to invest, love, reach, influence non-believers for His kingdom. <br /> <br />However, we need to be aware. We need to be prayerful. And we need to constantly be evaluating our hearts, for our priority is not to save our "friend" (that's God's job), but to keep ourselves from becoming our "friend."<br /> <br />I would also contest that the stereotypical "friends" listed above are probably not true friends. For friendship is a reciprocal relationship, filled with encouragement, giving and taking, honesty, and always acts in the best interest of the other person. <br /> <br />At the end of the day, your priority as a Christ-follower, wife, mom, homemaker is to put those things above all others. If you find your life being monopolized by being outside the home, you need to have a heart-to-heart with God and ask Him to reveal what you're running away from. Friends are the sweetest things to happen to life...but family trumps friends, for that's how God intended it. <br /> <br />Here's to true friendships! I am grateful for you!! <br /> <br />Lots of love mamas!Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-15585246169694810282010-02-17T17:17:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:18:28.661-08:00L.O.V.E.Good morning, my friends! <br /> <br />I hope you were blessed this weekend by your family for Valentine's Day! I don't "love' this holiday because of the gifts or romantic expectations, but I love having one day that celebrates the heart behind all we do. For everything we do, as wives and moms, all starts with the heart...whether laundry, cooking, pep talks on the way to school, helping with homework, changing diapers, ironing shirts, running to the bank, buying the groceries, etc...this is all done because we LOVE. <br /> <br />Have you ever thought about that? How every little thing you do is all because of your heart for the people in your home? Today, go about the mundane tasks of mommyhood, wifehood, and livelihood, and do it with a heart of love. Let this be an amazing living experiment and see if you experience anything different. Not in the response of others, but in the state of your own heart and attitude. <br /> <br />Proverbs 17<br /> <br />3 Fire tests the purity of silver and gold,<br /> but the Lord tests the heart.<br /><br /> <br />Today, this verse popped out at me, because I love the wording...fire tests purity, but the Lord tests the heart. <br /> <br />Fire is one of those things in life that can be strangely beautiful and mesmerizing, or threatening and destructive depending on the situation. The warmth and comfort from a fire roaring in your family room fire place has a very different feel from the fire barreling down the canyon behind your home with unpredictable wind speeds and direction. One you cuddle up in front of with the ones you love to feel the warmth on a cold night, and the other you shove everything of value (real or sentimental) and your loved ones in your car and run as fast as you can away from. <br /> <br />The only thing that differentiates the two is the control we have over the fire. In the fire place, bar-be-cue, stove burner, heater pilot light, or backyard fit pit, the fire is beautiful, even necessary for our lives. For it provides warmth and heat enabling us to cook, stay warm, have hot water, dry clothes, even dry hair (okay...I know your hair dryer doesn't have fire, but have you ever lit your hair on fire because it gets too hot?? Let's just say, I've have a few mishaps!!). Fire is good. It is for our good.<br /> <br />The wildfires we have witnessed, especially in Southern California, are just the opposite: wild, out-of-control, unpredictable, life-threatening, willing to eat any fuel in its way indiscriminately, rapid, has no boundaries, and potentially no end. We have no control over these fires, and it's the very opposite: we are controlled by these fires. <br /> <br />But the purpose of the fire is the same: burn what is dead, and strengthen what remains alive. <br /> <br />A forest fire is a necessary event in the cycle of nature created to clear away the dead, allow room for the new growth, even popping open some seeds that are only broken open by extreme heat. Have you ever seen a cut tree ring that has the scar of a fire on it? It looks marred and yet, that new bark grew right over it and the tree continued on in its glory and splendor. <br /> <br />This is was the Lord does with His fire. From the beginning of time, God created the world to withstand and endure fire. It is a natural element with a purpose. And yet, it's destructive, frightening, and hurtful. <br /> <br />Have you ever sung that song, "Refiner's Fire"? When in college, we sang it every Friday in chapel: "Refiner's Fire...my heart's one desire...is to be...holy...set apart for you Lord...it is to be...holy...set apart for you Lord...ready to do Your will." I love it! Because our ONE desire is to BE holy and therefore giving glory to Him. Amazing! <br /> <br />So let's look at a few things that the Lord would love to burn out of our lives and replace with attributes that are from Him:<br /> <br />1. Faithfulness replaces doubt and fear: <br /> <br />Usually we fear and have doubt in what we cannot see. We're convinced that it's the out-of-control fire that we're sure rages in our future that throws us into a tizzy today and wastes today's opportunities of their potential. And yet, we are called to put our faith in Him, not because of what we see, but because of WHO He is! <br /> <br />2 Corinthians 5:7 We live by faith, not by sight.<br /> <br />Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.<br /> <br />2. Trust replaces worry: <br /> <br />We like to know how the story is going to end, don't we? I have friends who will not read a book unless they read the last 5 pages and know how it's going to end. They have to know that their time spent reading will be worth it in the end. Have you ever endured a crazy movie and then nothing is solved at the end, and you walk away hating the movie, especially if I've paid full price for the ticket? ME TOO! But we judge the worth of the story based upon whether it ends how WE want it to end. <br /> <br />Sometimes we treat the Lord the same way. We'll follow if we are guaranteed that the outcome is easy, comfortable, and we come out better. But sometimes it's not that way...but it's still for our good, our growth, His glory. <br /> <br />Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart <br />and lean not on your own understanding; <br /><br />6 in all your ways acknowledge him, <br />and he will make your paths straight. <br /><br /><br />Hebrews 10:21-24 ...and since we have a great priest over the house of God,22 let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful.24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.<br /> <br />3. Wisdom replaces foolishness:<br /> <br />I love this, because it all begins with our thoughts. Refining our thoughts, our motives, our interpretation of reality through HIS filter breeds wisdom. How amazing is it that we're not destined to remain clueless and foolish? How amazing is it that we can LEARN and GROW? Can you imagine if we never grew? A world full of mental toddlers would be disastrous! <br /> <br />Proverbs 1:2-6 To know wisdom and instruction, To perceive the words of understanding, <br /><br />3 To receive the instruction of wisdom, Justice, judgment, and equity; <br /><br />4 To give prudence to the simple, To the young man knowledge and discretion— <br /><br />5 A wise man will hear and increase learning, And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel— <br /><br />6 To understand a proverb and an enigma, The words of the wise and their riddles. <br /><br />James 3:17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace‑loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.<br /> <br />4. Repentance replaces sin: <br /> <br />Repentance and forsaking is when we are set free from our sin. Set free when we CHOOSE to let go of that sin that is rotting the inners of our soul. Whatever you are harboring, whatever you are holding on to, whatever you are hiding...let it go. He will free you. <br /> <br />Proverbs 28:13 He who conceals his sins does not prosper, <br />but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy. <br /><br />2 Corinthians 7:9-11 (Paul writes...) yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us.10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.11 See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to be innocent in this matter. <br />5. Forgiveness replaces guilt:<br /> <br />I think women can be their own worst enemies. Forgiving ourselves of the mistakes in the past is so so hard. But after repentance, forgiveness is the last step that allows you to move on. For to grow, you have to move on. A tree doesn't hold onto the scar as a badge of courage, for the new bark grows around it. The new bark might look different and not be perfect, but it allows the tree to forgive the past, learn from it, and then eventually forget it. We have to let things go. <br /> <br />Ladies, we are NOT perfect. We will never be perfect...for it's not even in our DNA. (And if we were, then we would NOT need the Lord. We'd be able to save ourselves, right?) So, stop holding yourself to perfection, and hold yourself to the Lord. What a concept, huh? I have to digest that one too! <br /> <br />1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.<br /> <br />Ephesians 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another**, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. **(including yourself)<br /> <br />6. Endurance replaces weakness:<br /> <br />I lack so much endurance, it's really not even funny. I always start out strong, but then wane as time goes by. Let's safely assume I'm the hare, not the turtle. <br /> <br />But enduring the fire requires endurance. For we are made weak through trials and tribulations, but it is through His strength that we are able to endure WITH endurance. And He hangs in there with us because He loves us with all His heart. <br /> <br />1 Corinthians 13:7-8a It (love) always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Hebrews 12:1-2 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. <br /><br /> <br /><br />7. Patience replaces anger and frustration: <br /> <br />What's the first thing to fly out the window when you're angry? And why are you angry in the first place? My bet would be you lose your patience...and you lose it because something has not gone as you have planned. I only know because I live this daily! <br /> <br />Be still...take a deep breath, blow out slowly, eyes closed, say a quick prayer, and reorient your mind to Him, and start over. For when we experience trials, do you ever realize that you'd love to run through them instead of waiting patiently for the Lord to work you through it? I know! I love to push things through, but we I do, I injure people along the way! I'm learning! <br /> <br />Psalm 46:10a “Be still, and know that I am God;" <br /> <br />James 1:2-6 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.6 But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.7 That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord;<br /> <br />Fires, trials, tribulations are NOT fun; they are not comfortable, easy, nor desired. But they are meant to refine, to purify, to restart, to freshen, to prune, to clear out, to clean our hearts, and to ultimately be prepared for the purpose He has us on earth to do. <br /> <br />Ladies, His fire is just part of the journey. And our hearts, carrying that scar will heal, will look back and know its there, but also be a testimony of the strength of the Lord that carried us through times that we may want to forget. It is all for our good and His glory. <br /> <br />Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. <br /> <br />Lots of LOVE, girls. LOVE LOVE LOVE like you've never LOVED before. For HE IS LOVE! And isn't that amazing? <br /> <br />Have a lovely weekend! (I'm off to San Francisco for a business meeting tomorrow morning! Pray for safe travels, for Cliff's sanity with the kids, and that I stay awake in probably the most boring meetings of my life! HEWE!)Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-15253197627960952832010-02-10T17:15:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:17:04.991-08:00Stop The FlowProverbs 10 <br /><br /> <br /><br />Oh, mamas! <br /><br /> <br /><br />So true confessions: I chose this verse for purely selfish reasons. My mouth, my words, my indiscretion, my expressed thoughtlessness are things I have always struggled with, since the dawn of my time. <br /><br /> <br /><br />My grandma is in town and my kids are thrilled to be around Great-Grandma Peddie. Last night they had to put on a “Crazy Circus” for her. As they hammed it up for her doing funny tricks and telling funny jokes, I made the fatal mistake of saying, “I don’t know where they get this from.” She and my mom both looked at me like I was insane and exclaimed at the same time, “We do!” Ego. Struck. Dead. HAA! <br /><br /> <br /><br />I actually “love” this verse because it is WHAT I need to do. It’s not what I do…but it’s what I NEED to do. So, let’s unpack it, if for no one else’s benefit but mine! Hee!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 10:19 <br /><br /> <br /><br />“Don’t talk too much, for it fosters sin. Be sensible and turn off the flow!” <br /><br /> <br /><br />Let’s make the fair assumption that this verse was written for us, girls. With our word capacity being 24,000 words a day, compared to our men’s 12,000, I think we can safely say it’s our verbal flow that is in need of stoppage. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Obviously, simple talking does not equate sin. Communication is necessary for our existence, and the Lord knows that. I remember reading in O Magazine about a man who lived in silence for 16 years! I laughed when reading it because, of course, it was a MAN living in silence for a woman would never make that sacrifice! HEE! <br /><br /> <br /><br />But this verse addresses the excessive talking that we easily engage in. It’s this talking that becomes counterproductive to the purpose of real talking is designed to do. It becomes harmful, hurtful, sharp, and self-centered. Ultimately it is what is said in the excess that can create sin! <br /><br /> <br /><br />5 Ways Talking Can Turn Into Sin: <br /><br /> <br /><br />1.Gossip: <br /> <br /><br />We girls love having the inside scoop, don’t we? If we didn’t, magazines like People, InTouch, Us Weekly, and internet sites like PerezHilton.com would have no one to read them, and would cease to exist. <br /><br /> <br /><br />We love knowing things that are none of our business. We even thrive on analyzing other people’s choices and misery, giving our own lives a false sense of stability and validation that comes from comparing. <br /><br /> <br /><br />But what’s worse is in moments of weakness we easily spread information about the people we love and adore to others who should not be in possession of their information. This in itself is an obvious violation of trust. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The Excuses We Use: <br /><br /> <br /><br />-“It’s a prayer request.” We gossip under the false pretense we want others to pray for our friends. Then we convince ourselves that in order to do so, others need to know all the sordid details of their short-comings and circumstances. This happens all the time, especially in Christian circles. <br /><br /> <br /><br />-“It’s not that big of a deal.” Their problems aren’t that tragic, so it’s not a big deal if others know. However, it may be a big deal to the person who shared with you. <br /><br />- “I’ll just tell one person, that’s it.” We fool ourselves thinking if we just tell one person, they won’t turn around and “just tell one more person.” Safely assume that when you tell someone something, they in turn will tell someone else. We should know this after playing Operator at some point in our lives! <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br />Rules of Sensibility: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- If someone has shared something with you in confidence, don’t tell anyone else unless you have her permission to share with a specific person. <br /><br />- If you feel there is another person who could help her more than you (wiser, older woman), again, ask her permission before you tell her story. This intention would be to get your friend in contact with the older, wiser woman…and for you to step out of that relationship. Remember, it is her story to tell. <br /><br />- If, and ONLY if, you know blatantly this person is a danger to herself or those around her, you may report her story to the proper authorities. This is done out of love for your friend and looking out for her immediate health and best interest of her family. <br /><br /> <br /><br />2.Inappropriate Sharing of Personal Information: <br /> <br /><br />We do this all the time to our hubbies and the state of our marriages. We get together with a bunch of girlfriends and divulge every detail of our married life. It’s sad, because in most instances, our husbands do not come out as winners. More than likely it’s a man-bashing festival of great proportions. And if you don’t bash, then you’re seen as an outsider or a do-gooder. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The sin is in the violation of the bond of marriage…the love and respect that we share with our spouse is shot to pieces when we air our dirty laundry without concern for how our hubbies come out looking like in the end. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Excuses We Use: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- “I’m just telling the truth.” Unfortunately the truth is solely from our perspective and more than likely vindicates us from playing any part of the relationship. <br /><br />- “I am just sharing.” “Sharing” includes all of my experiences, which includes all of HIS experiences…his good and his bad. <br /><br />- “I get caught up in what my friends are talking about.” If they’re all bashing their hubbies, then I want to jump in. All in the spirit of camaraderie. <br /><br />- “I share to make her feel better about her marriage.” She has it worse than me, and I don’t want her to feel alone, so I chime in. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Rules of Sensibility: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- Pretend your hubby is in the room listening to your conversation. Would he be embarrassed, uncomfortable, angry, or sad? If the answer is yes to any of these, you need to stop the flow. <br /><br />- Would he ever want to be around these “friends” of yours, knowing what they know? If the answer is “no” then you need to stop “sharing.” <br /><br />- If you really want advice on your marriage, then you need to share what YOU struggle with and what YOU want to change. Do not ask your friends about what HE can change…for YOU can only change YOU. If chosen wisely, your friends will support and encourage you to make the changes to enhance your part in the marriage. They will even cheer you on towards His glory for your relationship! <br /><br /> <br /><br />3.Too Wordy: <br /> <br /><br />Have you ever been around a 4-year-old little girl who just talks with no point, no purpose, no rhyme or reason…just to hear her own voice? I actually live with one, so I know this from first-hand experience. <br /><br /> <br /><br />When we aren’t generally controlling the flow from our mouths, not only do we lose discretion over the kinds of words that come from our lips, but we lose discretion over the amount of words we use. All of a sudden the flow has no valves to stop it. We just talk and talk and talk. <br /><br /> <br /><br />The unfortunate thing is that the first place where the Lord wants to mold and renew us as His daughters, is in our thoughts. If we do not give enough attention and time to sift through our thoughts and put them through His filter, then what leaves our mouths is not of Him. When we speak without thinking, it is not honoring to the Lord. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Excuses We Use: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- “I just didn’t think.” It’s always after the fact that you think. You didn’t think before you spoke. You just spoke. But the problem with words is that you cannot take them back. And very rarely can you undo them, unless forgiveness is granted. <br /><br />- “This is the way I am. I speak my mind.” Well then, eventually you will be very lonely…or you will be living with very unhappy people. Promise. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Rules of Sensibility: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- If you think something, wait 30 seconds. In those 30 seconds, test your thoughts through God’s truth, the truth of the situation, and the truth of the person in the scenario. Remember, your perspective is not truth. <br /><br />- Ask yourself what the consequence will be if you voice your thought and then weigh f the result is worth it. If not, then don’t say anything and let it go. <br /><br />- Ask yourself WHY you would voice your thought. What are you expecting to accomplish? If it’s nothing positive, then don’t say anything. <br /><br />- If you are simply trying to fill the silence, turn on music or start reciting Bible verses. Fill the silence with something more wise than your own unfiltered thoughts. <br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br />4.Criticism:<br /> <br /><br />I think as women sometimes we get in the “mother knows best” rut and then feel we have to voice every critical comment that comes to our mind. We don’t care whose spirit we step all over, we are “called” to critique and fix anything someone else is doing wrong. <br /><br /> <br /><br />There is no filter of what is important and what is not, for you see it as all important. From the shoes that don’t match, to the way he sings with the radio, to the way your hubby feeds the kids, to the way your son puts the cap on the toothpaste, to the way the school sends home notices, to the way your friend drives…criticism can eat your heart alive. Have you ever noticed that it can get worse around that time of month? <br /><br /> <br /><br />In addition to the consuming negativity of your criticism on your own heart, your criticism also destroys the lives of those we love. I was listening to Dr. Laura on the radio and a lady called crying hysterically because she was very critical with her husband and kids. Dr. Laura asked why and she said, “That’s the way my mom was. She loved us through her criticism.” How warped is that? Criticism is not love. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Constructive criticism is totally different than the harsh, no-holds-bar criticism some of us “offer”. The people who are the victims of our criticism tend to be our amazing hubbies and innocent little ones. With our words, we can trample hopes, dreams, joy, and happiness. We create an atmosphere of fear and walking on egg-shells. As women of the Lord, we are called to be more thoughtful than this. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Excuses We Use: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- “It is wrong and I have to say something.” Something may be wrong in your opinion, but not in the moral or spiritual sense of wrong. <br /><br />- “I’m the mother, that’s why.” We tend to believe that our opinion is not to be questioned. We were placed by God to be your god, right? Wrong. <br /><br />- “It’s the truth.” Criticism is truth packaged in nastiness. Criticism is truth without concern for the heart or for the well-being of the person. Criticism is the thing that will destroy the hope in any relationship. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Rules of Sensibility: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- If someone said what you are going to say to you, would you be offended? If yes, then don’t say it. (And be honest. Your skin is not that thick! Promise!) <br /><br />- Determine if this is a mountain or a molehill. If it’s a molehill, then let it go. If it’s a mountain then don’t address it until you can communicate with kindness. <br /><br />- Take a deep breath and then take into account the person’s heart and list five good things about them in your mind. This will help reshape your frame of mind and lessen the frustration. Revisit the criticism, rephrase it with love, and then MOVE ON . <br /><br />- Forgive. When you forgive, you lighten your heart. You allow joy to enter your life, and somehow criticisms will not pop into your mind as easily. <br /><br /> <br /><br />5.Self-Centered: <br /> <br /><br />Have you ever been in conversation with a person who never asks you about you…who never shows an interest in your interests…or who isn’t concerned with you? I’ve had friendships like that in the past. And let me say, that those friendships don’t last very long. I was actually once friends with a woman who, when she had something to say, would just talk right over me without waiting for me to finish. What on earth, right? Don’t we learn in preschool to listen? <br /><br /> <br /><br />But in turn, we women have a hard time listening to our own hubbies, especially when we have so much to say ourselves. No wonder they feel as though they can never get a word in edge-wise. We’re too busy going on and on about our day, our thoughts, our emotions, our complaints, to listen to our men. And we don’t even need him to prompt us to talk. We just do it. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Excuses We Use: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- We have no excuse, for we are so self-absorbed we don’t even know we need an excuse. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Rules of Sensibility: <br /><br /> <br /><br />- If you realize you have fallen into this habit, make it a point to initiate the conversation by being the FIRST to ask the other person a question. <br /><br />- Be sensitive to the other person, reading body language, eye contact, and general interest in the conversation. <br /><br />- If the person is uninterested, reevaluate the purpose of the conversation, get to the point faster, ask if there would be a better time to talk, or drop it all together. <br /><br />- Give the other person the benefit of the doubt. When Cliff has a hard day at work, he’s not so apt to ask me about my day, nor want to hear a minute-by-minute blow-by-blow account for my day with the kiddos. In those times I remember his saying, “Just the news, not the weather.” This helps me to decide what he HAS to know to function, and what he doesn’t. If we talk too much then all our men will hear is “wah-wah-wah” like Charlie Brown and his teacher. When our hubbies turn off their ears, then we lose the ability to touch our hubby’s heart. <br /><br />- Be quick to listen. Slow to speak. <br /><br />- Be other oriented. Make sure you are tending to other’s needs first before your own. This will change everything about your relationships. <br /><br /> <br /><br />I am challenged in all areas. But I am excited! It’s when we are equipped that we can move forward. Girls! We can do this! Because self-control is a fruit of the Spirit…we are all capable through the strength of the Lord. He wants to use our words to spur on our loved ones’ hearts and minds towards Him. But it all starts with us. <br /><br /> <br /><br />I pray that today, you bite your tongue when you don’t want to…you think before you speak…and you find ways to be an encourager for your spouse, your children, and your friends. I will be doing the same. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Here's to stopping the flow!! <br /><br /> <br /><br />With love and complete respect!Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-83705520343555759652010-02-09T17:13:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:15:49.258-08:00Folly's DangerOkay...6:23am, 4 days late. I KNOW! What happened to me? <br /> <br />Well, it started by pulling an all-nighter to get a bunch of tasks checked off my list. Crazy? Maybe. Productive? Totally. And Makena was sick this whole week and home with me...that shot any free time I actually thought I had. Not that I'm a helicopter parent hovering over her in every moment, but because just when my concentration kicks in, she asks for water, wants to watch a movie, changes into shorts and a t-shirt (and then I have to explain its 68 degrees in our house, change back into pants and a long-sleeved shirt), and on and on the cycle goes. Wednesday we set up a wireless network in our home (YEAH!) and our internet and computers were out-of-commission for a good 5 hours (that totally cramps my style!!). And well, Thursday, I kept both kids home just for a fun day (but don't tell them that...they think it was because they both have raspy voices!!). Wah-la. <br /> <br />Friday, February 12th...6:28am. Proverbs 9!<br /> <br />13 The woman named Folly is brash.<br /> She is ignorant and doesn't know it.<br />14 She sits in her doorway<br /> on the heights overlooking the city.<br />15 She calls out to men going by<br /> who are minding their own business.<br />16 "Come in with me," she urges the simple.<br /> To those who lack good judgment, she says,<br />17 "Stolen water is refreshing;<br /> food eaten in secret tastes the best!"<br />18 But little do they know that the dead are there.<br /> Her guests are in the depths of the grave.<br /> <br />Oh, Folly...let's just call her Dolly for the sake of this email. I always like naming personalities, not that I'm schizophrenic, but because it brings her character to life! <br />So, Dolly's just chillin' on her front stoop. You know these kind of girls (maybe you don't, but pretend you do!). She's loud, brash, bordering on obnoxious. She draws attention to herself by laughing with a cackle, fake screaming when someone pranks her, and being silly with those who will actually sit with them. You know she's a little emotionally unstable for some valid reason, but if you asked her, she would have no idea. This is simply who she is. <br />Did you notice that Dolly has nothing better to do? She has no family, nobody around her to ask her what she's doing with her life. Instead she lives in the moment. She's idle...and you know what they say about idle hands. She has no daily, even hourly purpose, so she just hangs. Hangs and waits for anything or anyone to happen to her. <br />If situations don't just fall into her lap, she'll create them. Hollering down the block at those walking “minding their own business” (v15), flirting, taunting, luring, and genuinely being undiscerning about whom she attracts. She doesn't care about what kind of person falls into her trance, because it's not about them. It's about her: what attention she's getting, what validation she's receiving, because her worth is proven when a person falls into sin…she has sold their soul. That is her sole purpose. <br /> <br />But Folly is just not after our men…for Folly is after us. <br /> <br />Folly is the “gateway drug” for any sin. It’s the foolish flirtation with temptation that easily and eventually leads to sin. It’s the entertaining of the sin in your mind and heart. And if you play with fire long enough, eventually you will get burned. <br /> <br />Most people don’t realize that Folly is where sin begins. They don’t understand the sin they’ve fallen into was the result of a process that began long before the actual sin. Have you ever heard broken people say, “I don’t know how I got here”? Have you even heard parents say, “I had no idea my child was this far lost”? Have you ever asked those questions of yourself? I know I have! Usually in the moments of complete despair of how much I have ruined my own life. <br /> <br />In search of wisdom, let’s spend the next couple minutes dissecting Folly’s allure and how she uses our own sinful nature against us. Once we look carefully at Folly, we can be more vigilant for ourselves and for our little ones.<br /> <br />[**Sidenote: Notice I do not include our hubbies in that list…for we are not their Holy Spirit. As my Bible study leader says, “God does not have an opening for that position. It is adequately filled by the Holy Spirit.” Love that! We can be vigilant in preventative measures…doing what we are called to do as wives, lovers, friends, help mates, encouragers. But if our hubby falls, we must stop the finger pointing, the shaming, the guilt tripping, and instead need to get down on our knees and pray, pray, pray that our man’s heart becomes more and more sensitive to the wisdom He calls him to live by. <br /> <br />I know for me, when I start becoming Cliff’s Holy Spirit (or mother), I lose sight of the respect I am to have for my hubby and as a result, submission goes flying out the window. I then am haughty and arrogant, easily annoyed, and angered, because I have called the shots and he has not listened to me. How dare he? And soon my marriage has flipped totally upside down and I am the one at fault. This happens all the time to me! Ugh! I am in a constant stage of learning!] <br /> <br />Whether we want it or not, Folly is there. She waits for us. Sometimes she’s not as blatant as sitting along the path we’re on, but she’s there. For our health, it is best for us to see her, to be aware of her, and to understand the danger she poses. That doesn’t mean we interact with her, but we must at least acknowledge her presence. When our eyes are blind to our surroundings, this is when we can easily fall prey to things out there. <br /> <br />It’s like all the warnings we women receive when walking across a parking lot at night by ourselves to ward off a possible attack: walk with confidence and power, look like we know where we’re going and nothing’s going to stop us from getting there, be totally aware of our surroundings constantly scanning our surroundings without being distracted, stay in the lit and populated areas, and have our keys laced between our fingers. It is these tools we can have when looking at the danger that may be lurking (or not) around in the darkness. <br /> <br />Like the potential attackers, Folly waits for the simple…those lacking good judgment. When you are unprepared, you are forced to be on the defense instead of offense, which means immediately you are at a disadvantage. To save our lives, we must be proactive, not reactive. When we are reactionary, problems will overtake our good judgment. We are all “simple” at one point or another (v16). <br /> <br />Folly’s Plan of Attack (Spoken from Folly’s point-of-view):<br /> <br />1. Get the Person to Stop at My Stoop: Questioning Judgment <br /><br /> <br /><br />She stopped. She saw me and stopped. Most people avoid me and walk right on by. But not her. I know she stopped because something in her is interested in what I can offer. She thinks stopping is harmless, but I know that unless she has an amazing will-power, this is her fatal mistake. I’ll have to entice her a little more, encourage her to come up the steps, but I know that if they stop I can sell them a whole bunch of lies that the majority believed. She has opened her heart and mind up to the possibilities I can offer her on the surface. I know I can do this. <br /><br /> <br />2. Say Enough to Get the Girl To Walk Up the Steps to Get a Closer Look. Dulling Judgment <br /><br /> <br />She comes up for a closer look. From afar, I look interesting, harmless, even beautiful. The grass at the top of the stoop is much better than the grass at the bottom, or so she thinks. I know the conversation she’s having with herself…she’s trying to convince herself that this is no big deal. She’s not looking for the sin I know is hiding behind my front door, or even TO sin, but she “just” wants to know more. This is where the saying “curiosity killed the cat” comes from. <br /><br /> <br /><br />At this point, her judgment is dulling. The girl justified walking up the steps believing she still has the wits and the wisdom to retreat. She may think that she’s looking for reasons to go, but she’s really looking for reasons to stay. Most are unaware this is happening in their hearts, but this is why she was drawn to me in the first place. She may be scared of me, but she’ll find a way to squelch it. Once she’s creeping towards me, I know I have her. I have her heart and soul. It belongs to me…and more importantly, it belongs to my master. She may not know it, but I do. I’ve seen this happen time and time again. This is what I’m good at. <br /><br /> <br />3. Get The Girl to Engage in a Conversation with Me. Lacking Judgment <br /><br /> <br /><br />I can sell ice cubes to Eskimos. I can sell a car to someone who already has five. I can convince you using the best techniques the world has to offer. In this conversation, I will tell her everything she needs to be reassured of to continue on. I use guilt, regret, remorse, pride, arrogance, anger, pity, sympathy, despair, dares, insults, compliments, lies, crazy-making…and I’m good. I always get my girl. Always. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Before she knows it, she’ll be agreeing with me, compromising her values for me, and soon she’ll even forget who she is. I will have her all mixed-up and confused. <br /><br />I know she’s mine because she’s lost all judgment. Everything she knew was right is now wrong. Her world has turned upside down…and I did that to her. She’ll never win against me. She won’t leave unscathed. I have her smack down in the palm of my hand, and I will deliver her through those doors behind me. Again, this is my job. <br /><br /> <br />Four Lies I may Tell You to Lose Your Wits: <br /><br />1. “It’s not a big deal.” I can’t believe your questioning this because it’s not that big of a deal. PUHHHH-LEEEASE, girl! This is nothing compared to the evil in the world. Besides you’re not doing anything wrong. <br /><br />2. “You’ll love it.” You’ll have fun, enjoy every moment, feel like you’re living on the edge, and be someone totally different that you are right now. Besides, the pain only comes after you are caught, which I’ll never tell you because I’m Folly. It’s all about enjoying the moment. <br /><br />3. “Everyone does it.” If everyone does it, how bad can it be? Seriously. My job is to minimize the gravity of your ultimate decision. <br /><br />4. “You are special.” You deserve this. You can handle this. You can walk away any time. But this is better than your normal life. You have suffered enough. You have put up with enough. You are worth more than all this, and you’ve earned this. <br /><br /> <br /><br />4. Get the Girl to Follow Me Through the Front Door. Death of Judgment <br /><br /> <br /><br />She’s sold. I told you I’d be successful. She bought it hook, line, and sinker. This was actually quite easy! I didn’t even break a sweat. She’s following me through the door of sin, to a place that only ends in death and destruction of her character, her soul, her heart, and the life she once led. I know she’s following me because she has no idea what long-term affects lie behind this door. She is so blinded by the short-term pleasure and ease derived from this decision that it is impossible for her to see the end result. <br /><br /> <br /><br />For if she saw the end, she would run away screaming. It’s my trick of mirrors. I make sure she never sees what is really there, and only sees what really isn’t there. I tell her what she needs to hear, surround her with people who validate her sin, point her in the direction that would hide the truth, and cover her with shame and guilt and fear assuring she will never leave. How could she leave, when she knows she is doomed. <br /><br /> <br /><br />There is always the possibility that she will wake up when she hits rock bottom, is discovered, or has lost some things or some ones in her life that matter more than this sin. But my job is not to keep her in sin…it’s just to get her in the front door. <br /><br /> <br />How exhausting is that? Makes me want to walk on the straight and narrow for the rest of my life. Yowza!!<br /> <br />As a forewarning, if you were able to walk away from Folly anywhere between Steps 1 through 4, the next time you are faced with her, you will be more likely to stop again and continue with the process. Rest assured, she will be there. When you least expect it, when you are at your weakest, when you are at your lowest, she will be there. Maybe it’s a whisper in your ear, a temptation that pops up, a tiny argument within your soul, it is there. <br /> <br />For many of us, it may be how we spend (or waste) our time…or money (for the most part our hubby’s hard-earned money)…or what we intake (TV, movies, conversations, internet)…or what we output (gossip, hurtful words, lack of affection or sex). This may not be an extra-marital affair, addiction to pain killers or alcohol, or an addiction to internet relationships, but we have our stuff, don’t we? And that stuff can be just as harmful to our relationships with others, with ourselves, and with our God as any “big” thing. For anything that becomes more important than the wisdom we hold in our hearts from the Lord, has the potential to destroy us. <br /> <br />You know, as we may come upon Folly, the Lord is watching us walk down that street and all He wants is us to run to Him, retreat in His protection and love, and be victorious over the pitfalls in our way. He is ready to rescue us at any point between Folly and sin…and even when we are deep in sin. For we serve a forgiving, merciful God who loves us more than we deserve. It is humbling and awesome in every sense of the word. For He is great. <br /> <br />So, my friends, be diligent for your own hearts and in guiding the hearts of your children. Be prayerful, mindful, and wisdom-ful for yourselves. And get on your knees for your hubbies, praying the Holy Spirit would be present, moving, and guiding in their hearts and lives. <br /> <br />Sorry for my tardiness. I know you are gracious to me…much more than I am with myself. I love each of you and am so blessed by you.<br /> <br />Love! RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-31041285897264408422010-02-08T17:13:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:13:24.150-08:00Put Down the LegosHey Girlies!!<br /> <br />GOOOOOOD MORNING, MONDAY! Good morning, week...good morning, schedule...good morning, routine...good morning, faith, hope, and love...good morning, peace that passes all understanding...and good morning, wisdom. <br /> <br />Ohhhh, good morning WISDOM! <br /> <br />After a weekend of family craziness, do you ever crave wisdom for the week? For a steady and rational view of life and all it entails, so you can live as drama free as possible? Me too! <br /> <br />Let me tell you, it's totally that time of month. I know that may be too much information, but we've all been there...you know, when wisdom definitely ISN'T there! Normally, my emotions race through my mind at a gazillion miles a minute like the Polar Express racing down the mountain into the gulch. I'm the conductor who's lost the pin that is necessary to make the train stop. Instead I become victim to all the wild "truths" that race through my mind, and lack the brakes of wisdom to filter them out. "He didn't help me with the kids, I'm outta here," "My son told me to leave his room, I'm going to take every toy out of it," "I hate laundry...for that matter, I hate my thighs, the zits on my face, and the fact that every 4 hours I have to think about what to cook." And on and on it goes. It's almost as if I'm possessed. Seriously! <br /> <br />As a result, picture my poor hubby and 2 kids hanging on the front grill of the train, praying they make it out alive, uninjured, and emotionally unscathed, as I inadvertently drive this train to a destination not originally on the iterinary. (And it's NOT going to the North Pole!!) <br /> <br />Most of the time I do find the brake pin to stop the train just before we reach emotional destruction; but there have been those months that I actually rehearse those "truths" in my head so much that when I'm done riding the hormonal Polar Express I ACTUALLY still harbor those emotions and refuse to get off the train. That makes sense, right? HAA! Wrong! <br /> <br />Last week, I warned Cliff that I might be emotionally unstable in the upcoming week. He looked at me like I was crazy, but nodded his head. I think I was hoping that WHEN crazy hit my brain, my warning would almost give me a free pass for acting out my craziness. <br /> <br />But this month it didn't happen. I didn't need to use my "free" (not really "free", huh?) pass because my brain was so focused on controlling the thoughts going through my head in the first place, that the words just didn't happen. I know! Shut UP! One small victory in the journey of life! <br /> <br />Now, I was not perfect...but I made sure that if I felt the craziness surface, I went in another room, talked under my breath, rolled my eyes at the wall, and then got over it! Shocking, huh?? <br /> <br />Sometimes we become victims to our own emotions...and even our own hormones, don't we? We forget to filter them through the reality in front of us. What we feel is, most of the time, NOT reality. I think, as women, we've given too much credence to our emotions and treated them as if they were the truth...and facts, perception, perspective don't matter. As long as we FEEL it, then it MUST be true.<br /> <br />So, let's tackle Wisdom in Proverbs 8:1-4: <br /> <br />1 Listen as Wisdom calls out!<br /> Hear as understanding raises her voice!<br />2 On the hilltop along the road,<br /> she takes her stand at the crossroads.<br />3 By the gates at the entrance to the town,<br /> on the road leading in, she cries aloud,<br />4 "I call to you, to all of you!<br /> I raise my voice to all people.<br /><br />I couldn't whittle this down to one verse, because collectively it is beautiful. A beautiful calling to our minds and our lives to discover Wisdom and all she has to offer. <br /> <br />I love that I see Wisdom at the beginning as a mom standing in the kitchen yelling down the hall, "Are you listening? I have good things to tell you! If you don't listen, then you are going to suffer the consequences." How many times do we ask, preach, yell this to our kids as moms? <br /> <br />My favorite question to ask Keegan (which I know I will never get an answer to) is, "What did I just say?" Because his blank look says it all: "I have no idea what you said because I was so concerned with my legos that I didn't EVEN know you were talking, let along talking to me." Then as his gentle mother, I grunt my frustration, launch into a mini-lecture on how a 6-year-old boy must have focus and attention, walk away shaking my head in total dismay knowing full well that this conversation will happen over and over again as if I'm beating my head against a wall. <br /> <br />But when we use that example on our own hearts, how many of us actually hear Wisdom talking, let alone actually talking to US? How many of us are so consumed with our emotions, our circumstances, difficult people, or life's drama to actually pause, hear Wisdom, redirect our course of action, and discover the Lord's path for our hour, day, year, life? <br /> <br />Or are you too busying playing with your "legos"? <br /> <br />Proverbs 8:5-9<br /> <br />5 How naive you are! Let me give you common sense.<br /> O foolish ones, let me give you understanding. <br />6 Listen to me! For I have excellent things to tell you.<br /> Everything I say is right,<br />7 for I speak the truth<br /> and hate every kind of deception.<br />8 My advice is wholesome and good.<br /> There is nothing crooked or twisted in it.<br />9 My words are plain to anyone with understanding,<br /> clear to those who want to learn.<br /> <br />These verses hit my heart with the "duh" thud. <br /> <br />Wisdom is excellent. Wisdom is good. Wisdom is understanding (not just of myself, but of everything around me). Wisdom is right. Wisdom is truth. Wisdom is wholesome. Wisdom is common sense. Wisdom is plain (how's that for revolutionary??). Wisdom is available to ALL who want to learn. Wisdom is God. <br /> <br />If this is His truth, then why is it so difficult for my mind to let go of MY wisdom, and embrace His wisdom? Do I really see myself as an equal with God? Do I really see myself as capable enough to figure it all out on my own? Do I really see myself infallible and right in all circumstances, conversations, complications? <br /> <br />Oh, mamas...do we have a reality check coming!! Maybe the answers to those questions are the root of why we are so unwise! <br /> <br />For here is the result when we actually do heed to Wisdom:<br /> <br />James 3:13-18<br /> <br />13 If you are wise and understand God's ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom. 14 But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your heart, don't cover up the truth with boasting and lying. 15 For jealousy and selfishness are not God's kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic. 16 For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.<br /><br />17 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. 18 And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.<br /><br /> <br />Today, my friends, just today...let's put down our legos, get off the hormonal Polar Express, find the brake pin for our mouths, hear Wisdom and, further, heed Wisdom, and love peace, be gentle, practice mercy, and good deeds. <br /> <br />What would the world look like if we actually did this? Pretty beautiful, I would imagine! <br /><br />Lots of love! Praying for you!!<br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-14779846462491340172010-02-05T17:11:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:12:20.750-08:00Leaving the PathAmen! It's Friday evening, and all's well! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Well, that is besides my baby girl coughing continually and sporting a fever. These are always the moments when you wish you could take the fever and cough upon yourself only to see your child bounce back! I'm sure Cliff would NOT want that, for a mommy out-of-commission is always harder on the spouse. But that's what mommys' hearts do: wish to spare their little ones from any pain or suffering when it comes to their health. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As you get to know me through these emails, you will always notice that I call my 6 and 4 year olds my "little ones" or my "babies." And when they are 10 and 12, much to their chagrin, I will most likely still call them my "babies." <br /><br /> <br /><br />There is something tender about seeing your not-so-babies still as your babies. It makes a verbal connection between that little one in utero and all the dreams you had for them, and the dirty, lanky, ready-to-lose-his-front-to-teeth, freckled covered kid standing in front of you! Personally, I need that connection! I tend to have short long-term memory! I remember the now, and maybe even the recent, but 6 years ago is a much more dim. <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, tonight, as you gather your family from the frantic pace of the week, hug your babies. Whether they're 29, 14, 10, 4, or 5 months. Hug them, cuddle them, and let them know you love them no matter what. Unconditionally love them, so that they will understand the love He has for them. A love that would take a cold away if it could; a love that would follow them to the ends of the earth to save them from themselves; a love that would allow them to experience consequences so they know better next time; a love that would grow them into the human beings He created them to be; and a love that ultimately is an example of His love for them. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Proverbs 5 <br /><br /> <br /><br />3 For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey,<br /> and her mouth is smoother than oil.<br />4 But in the end she is as bitter as poison,<br /> as dangerous as a double-edged sword.<br />5 Her feet go down to death;<br /> her steps lead straight to the grave.s<br />6 For she cares nothing about the path to life.<br /> She staggers down a crooked trail and doesn't realize it.<br /><br />I really want to focus on v. 6, but you can't read verse 6 without the other 3 preceeding iprecedinge're back to the immoral woman (yes, it's been a month!!), but I wanted to look at her from a different perspective than we did last month.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Yesterday, we talked about the path of righteous shining like "the first gleam of dawn" in Proverbs 4:18. Yet here we are today talking about a woman of a complete opposite persuasion, one that we'd classify as a general fool: <br /><br /> <br /><br />"For she cares nothing about the path to life. She staggers down a crooked trail and doesn't realize it." <br /><br /> <br /><br />What visuals does this create in your mind? How do you picture her? And what kind of feelings do you have towards her? <br /><br /> <br /><br />For me, she's a lost soul. She has no idea what she's missing in the depths of her soul, so she tries to fill the voids with men, alcohol (hence the staggering), cheap thrills, and bad high heels! I see her walking the streets looking for her next trick throwing random compliments out at the ugliest of men just hoping for someone to notice her. And I see her lonely, filling her time with strangers who don't know her...but only know her in the "biblical sense." How ironic is that? <br /><br /> <br /><br />But she has lived this life for so long, she has forgotten what the purpose of her existence is, "for she cares nothing about the path to life." Maybe she's on a suicide mission, just slowly. Maybe she's trying to numb the soul that begs to be searched. Maybe she's getting "love" (which we know is NOT love) the only way she knows. Maybe she has become so jaded, so hurt, so unloved, that her bitterness has not only consumed her, but has turned her into a predator who tempts and consumes others on the road to moral and spiritual destruction. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Maybe I should stop watching TV! This is pretty vivid! <br /><br /> <br /><br />So, what does this have to do with me and you? <br /><br /> <br /><br />I think there are times when we stray from His path of righteousness, in areas where we each personally struggle. Whether it's your thoughts, your words, your anger, your jealousy, your self-esteem, your need to be in control, your past, your relationships, your sin, whatever it may be, leaving the well-worn path of the Lord and following the "crooked trail" always looks the same: <br /><br /> <br /><br />-Rugged: It is always rocky, overgrown, filled sharp points with hidden dangers. There is no way to predict what will happen, or proceed with certainty and assurance that you will survive this. You may have faith in your own skills, but in the end, it will not be enough. <br /><br /> <br /><br />-Steep: It doesn't always start steep. It may just seem like an easier way down than following the obvious path. But as soon as you navigate it yourself, you will realize the degree of decline drops drastically and is dangerously slippery. What you once thought you could handle, you now realize is sucking you down like gravity. <br /><br /> <br /><br />-Overgrown: You may think you can make your way through the forest. But as you continue deeper into it away from the beaten path, the forest grows thicker and thicker, almost suffocating. You will end up disoriented, lost, and without guidance. <br /><br /> <br /><br />-Unexpected: Once you think you know what's up ahead, you will find that the reality can be even worse than what you expected. You thought your skills, knowledge, and forest cutting know-how would get you through, but too many variables are now being thrown at you...a steep ravine, a rushing river, poison ivy, a rain storm, a bear. You name it, it can happen. For you have left yourself open to the dangers of the wild. <br /><br /> <br /><br />-Uncharted: No other person has walked this trail...and those who have never returned. You are alone. You are lonely. There is nobody to help you through the dangers, and eventually your brain will convince you that what you are seeing is not the truth. All of a sudden right becomes wrong, and wrong becomes right, all to justify the decisions you are having to make. <br /><br /> <br /><br />And as we wander off His path, we have to convince ourselves that leaving His way is better, easier, quicker, more self-serving, more beneficial, less harmful, causing less conflict than pursuing truth. We may use the following excuses to make our decisions justifiable: <br /><br /> <br /><br />1. Survival: "I had to" in order to preserve myself: my own being, health, pride, worth, reputation, arrogance, perceived integrity, etc. <br /><br /> <br /><br />2. Victim: I had no other choice, I was forced by someone else. <br /><br /> <br /><br />3. Revenge: I had to fight back and make my own way. <br /><br /> <br /><br />4. Peer Pressure: I lack self-awareness and conviction. Others are doing it, so I did it. Others are suffering from it, so am I. <br /><br /> <br /><br />5. Rebellion: I know what is right, but I turned my back because I no longer cared. <br /><br /> <br /><br />6. Foolish: Grass is greener on the other path...until you get to that path and realize you have been fooled. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Ladies...these excuses can apply to anyone struggling with choosing the Lord's path. Look at your children. Look at your friends. Look at your extended families. Look at your hubby. But most of all, look at yourselves. That crooked trail is not very far from any of us. The immoral woman who blatently walks it could easily be any of us, staring with the dimness in our hearts, then manifesting in our words and actions, in a quick instance if we turn our back on Him. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Fortunately, for us, that love that we have for our children, that love that will take the place of them when they're feverish, is the love the Lord has for us, but even greater. His love will rescue us when we're clutching a rock by the tips of our fingers staring down at a rocky ravine below with no one else to save us. When we get ourselves in that predicament on our own, He WILL still seek and save us... <br /><br /> <br /><br />My precious friends, love those around you! Choose His path. Turn your back on the crooked trail. And receive His love! <br /><br /> <br /><br />Have an amazing weekend!Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-15255440154897736742010-02-04T21:06:00.000-08:002010-02-04T21:13:20.200-08:00TestingGood Morning Mamas!! <br /> <br />It's 6:05am and let me just say it's been 4 weeks of early-morning rising for the Schaumloeffel parents! That's a huge victory and a New Year's resolution that I didn't biff! Now, to address the plate of chocolate chip cookies on the counter that seems to lose a member at the most inopportune times: well, that resolution still needs work!! Self-control is definitely NOT one of my strong suits when it comes to CC Cookies! <br /> <br />Looking back a month, when you wrote our your goals for your year, how are you doing on them? Are you doing them? If so, what progress have you made? If not, what is getting in the way? (Email me personally if you want some accountability! I'd love to do that for you!)<br /> <br />As women of our homes, we should always have personal goals outside of motherhood and wife-dom (like "kingdom"...not wife-doom!!). It's what keeps our identity intact. What we do is NOT who we are. WHAT??? I know...wrap your brain around that one. My hubby is a medic; it's what he does; yesterday he put together a cameraman's finger that had been filleted by his camera in a shot (I know...I got chills too!); but what he does to provide for our family is NOT who he is. <br /> <br />Sometimes we get so wrapped up in doing, that we forget our being. What have you done lately to stretch your brain or your heart? What have you tried that's new? What have you done to chase your interests? <br /> <br />NOW...do not hear me say, "Hey, you hate being a wife...so follow your dreams and leave;" or any other non-sense that would validate the darkness in your heart. (And when it's dark, don't we try and look for that validation to justify our behavior?? I know I do. And if I'm looking for it, then I'm very selective in choosing friends. Who wants to be friends with someone pushing you in the direction of light??) <br /> <br />But, I'm saying, if cooking interests you, try something different. If gardening is your thing, do it! If reading something new, challenging, interesting is your cup of tea, GREAT! If sewing purses, starting a playgroup, beginning a blog, redecorating your home on the cheap, learning more about child development, running 5 miles a day, floats your boat...don't leave those things behind! <br /> <br />Sometimes I think we convince ourselves that if we're going to be great wives and moms, we must forsake all that interests us. But we don't. We may have to get up early to do so. We may have to budget our time better. We may have to do something out of the ordinary. But ladies, you were created uniquely by a God who meant for you to be exactly who you are. Don't lose that passion for life around you...and imagine the impact of the world if He led you! For you may be some other mommy's light down the road. <br /> <br />Proverbs 4<br /> <br />18 The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, <br />shining ever brighter till the full light of day. <br /><br />Officially, the dawn has not happened yet. But have you ever watched the sun rise? Have you ever sat and watched the glorious FIRST beam pop over the mountains and how bright it seems compared to the general glow of the sun behind it? <br /> <br />Last week, Cliff was working up at Castaic Lake and had to be dropped off around 6:45am. Each morning, I drove home facing east and got to witness that beam's first appearance. And it was amazing!! The air was pristine, the mountains pronounced, the glow of the sun made everything look clean, and my heart was filled with the hope of a new day. <br /> <br />Now, let me share that my perspective has changed over the years. Formerly, I hated sunrise. I hated it because it meant I had to face the world, gather every ounce of warrior-woman in me, and face the unknown. I hated thinking about the energy I had to muster just to make it to dinner time, and I would look way too far in the future to make getting up look like a monumental task only for the strong and successful. (And I loved sunset because it meant I was DONE!!)<br /> <br />But He has changed my thinking...for every morning is new. The opportunities waiting to be snatch, the achievements (such as laundry, kids not fighting, devotions) waiting to be made, the conversations waiting to be talked, the life waiting to be LIVED is so thrilling to me!! <br /> <br />For this day is His...and in the light of Him, it is mine! Mine lived in the glory of the Lord...only for His glory in the end! <br /> <br />Girls, whatever you do today, see His light. See the path of righteousness stretched out before you as that first beam of light that pops over the mountain top in the freshness of the morning, as your call to be His servant, to honor who He has created you to be, and to be in the position He has place you in as the keeper of your home, mother of your children, lover of your hubby with gusto and glory. <br /> <br />For if you do this, you will be an imitator of Christ. For in 2 Samuel, David speaks of Jesus: <br /> <br />2 Samuel 23:3-4 <br />The God of Israel spoke, <br />the Rock of Israel said to me: <br />‘When one rules over men in righteousness, <br />when he rules in the fear of God, <br /><br />4 he is like the light of morning at sunrise <br />on a cloudless morning, <br />like the brightness after rain <br />that brings the grass from the earth.’ <br /><br /><br /><br />Be that light of a morning sunrise...the brightness after the rain...to your hubby, your kiddos, your home, your friends, and your heart. Find that excitement, that fresh newness that honors who He created you to be...<br /> <br />And most of all, my friends, LIVE!<br /> <br />Love!!!<br /> <br />RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-61593937621071468342010-02-04T17:09:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:11:02.419-08:00Light of the DawnGood Morning Mamas!! <br /> <br />It's 6:05am and let me just say it's been 4 weeks of early-morning rising for the Schaumloeffel parents! That's a huge victory and a New Year's resolution that I didn't biff! Now, to address the plate of chocolate chip cookies on the counter that seems to lose a member at the most inopportune times: well, that resolution still needs work!! Self-control is definitely NOT one of my strong suits when it comes to CC Cookies! <br /> <br />Looking back a month, when you wrote our your goals for your year, how are you doing on them? Are you doing them? If so, what progress have you made? If not, what is getting in the way? (Email me personally if you want some accountability! I'd love to do that for you!)<br /> <br />As women of our homes, we should always have personal goals outside of motherhood and wife-dom (like "kingdom"...not wife-doom!!). It's what keeps our identity intact. What we do is NOT who we are. WHAT??? I know...wrap your brain around that one. My hubby is a medic; it's what he does; yesterday he put together a cameraman's finger that had been filleted by his camera in a shot (I know...I got chills too!); but what he does to provide for our family is NOT who he is. <br /> <br />Sometimes we get so wrapped up in doing, that we forget our being. What have you done lately to stretch your brain or your heart? What have you tried that's new? What have you done to chase your interests? <br /> <br />NOW...do not hear me say, "Hey, you hate being a wife...so follow your dreams and leave;" or any other non-sense that would validate the darkness in your heart. (And when it's dark, don't we try and look for that validation to justify our behavior?? I know I do. And if I'm looking for it, then I'm very selective in choosing friends. Who wants to be friends with someone pushing you in the direction of light??) <br /> <br />But, I'm saying, if cooking interests you, try something different. If gardening is your thing, do it! If reading something new, challenging, interesting is your cup of tea, GREAT! If sewing purses, starting a playgroup, beginning a blog, redecorating your home on the cheap, learning more about child development, running 5 miles a day, floats your boat...don't leave those things behind! <br /> <br />Sometimes I think we convince ourselves that if we're going to be great wives and moms, we must forsake all that interests us. But we don't. We may have to get up early to do so. We may have to budget our time better. We may have to do something out of the ordinary. But ladies, you were created uniquely by a God who meant for you to be exactly who you are. Don't lose that passion for life around you...and imagine the impact of the world if He led you! For you may be some other mommy's light down the road. <br /> <br />Proverbs 4<br /> <br />18 The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, <br />shining ever brighter till the full light of day. <br /><br />Officially, the dawn has not happened yet. But have you ever watched the sun rise? Have you ever sat and watched the glorious FIRST beam pop over the mountains and how bright it seems compared to the general glow of the sun behind it? <br /> <br />Last week, Cliff was working up at Castaic Lake and had to be dropped off around 6:45am. Each morning, I drove home facing east and got to witness that beam's first appearance. And it was amazing!! The air was pristine, the mountains pronounced, the glow of the sun made everything look clean, and my heart was filled with the hope of a new day. <br /> <br />Now, let me share that my perspective has changed over the years. Formerly, I hated sunrise. I hated it because it meant I had to face the world, gather every ounce of warrior-woman in me, and face the unknown. I hated thinking about the energy I had to muster just to make it to dinner time, and I would look way too far in the future to make getting up look like a monumental task only for the strong and successful. (And I loved sunset because it meant I was DONE!!)<br /> <br />But He has changed my thinking...for every morning is new. The opportunities waiting to be snatch, the achievements (such as laundry, kids not fighting, devotions) waiting to be made, the conversations waiting to be talked, the life waiting to be LIVED is so thrilling to me!! <br /> <br />For this day is His...and in the light of Him, it is mine! Mine lived in the glory of the Lord...only for His glory in the end! <br /> <br />Girls, whatever you do today, see His light. See the path of righteousness stretched out before you as that first beam of light that pops over the mountain top in the freshness of the morning, as your call to be His servant, to honor who He has created you to be, and to be in the position He has place you in as the keeper of your home, mother of your children, lover of your hubby with gusto and glory. <br /> <br />For if you do this, you will be an imitator of Christ. For in 2 Samuel, David speaks of Jesus: <br /> <br />2 Samuel 23:3-4 <br />The God of Israel spoke, <br />the Rock of Israel said to me: <br />‘When one rules over men in righteousness, <br />when he rules in the fear of God, <br /><br />4 he is like the light of morning at sunrise <br />on a cloudless morning, <br />like the brightness after rain <br />that brings the grass from the earth.’ <br /><br /><br /><br />Be that light of a morning sunrise...the brightness after the rain...to your hubby, your kiddos, your home, your friends, and your heart. Find that excitement, that fresh newness that honors who He created you to be...<br /> <br />And most of all, my friends, LIVE!<br /> <br />Love!!!<br /> <br />RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-58664178068365083322010-02-03T17:08:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:09:55.886-08:00Don't Worry, Be HappyTo my lovely lovely ladies...<br /> <br />Happy Wednesday! <br /> <br />I realized that I start many of these emails with "happy" something. Happy is a word that is so overused in the English language: "Happy Birthday", "Welcome to McDonald's. Do you want a Happy Meal?", "Fine. I'll do it. Are you happy now?" <br /> <br />Happy: 1 : favored by luck or fortune : fortunate (a happy coincidence) (omit 2)<br />3 a : enjoying or characterized by well-being and contentment (is the happiest person I know) (a happy childhood) b : expressing, reflecting, or suggestive of happiness (a happy ending) c : glad, pleased (I'm happy to meet you) d : having or marked by an atmosphere of good fellowship : friendly (a happy office)<br /><br /> <br />I do think happy is more than luck or fortune. For happiness comes from a place of inner joy, contentment, well-being. It is when we choose to look at life and the fulfillment of the Lord as the well which all joy and happiness springs up, despite the fact we may be traipsing through the desert. For my friends, we ARE happy in His presence, in His will, in His grace. <br /> <br />Today...BE happy. Let happiness define your heart, thoughts, words, actions. Try smiling when you don't want to. Say "hi" to three strangers while passing by in the grocery aisles. Hug your babies more than normal. Answer your hubby's request with a happy response. <br /> <br />For we have NOTHING here on earth that will strip us from the happiness that comes with knowing the 80 or so years on this planet will not even come close to the eternity we will spend in heavenly bliss. When you put it in that context, why spend one moment in the muck of our circumstances? Fix your eyes on Him, and He will never let you go.<br /> <br />Proverbs 3: <br /> <br />5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart;<br /> do not depend on your own understanding.<br /> <br />If you haven't read the entire 3rd Proverb, then do it now. You'll love it. You'll be encouraged. And your heart will be uplifted. <br /> <br />Looking at v. 5 and considering the "all" we talked about yesterday in Proverbs 29 in regards to a fool venting "all" her anger, but a wise woman standing quietly and holding it in...we now look at something we CAN give our all to.<br /> <br />Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart. Do not lean on your own understanding. <br /> <br />What does that look like to you?<br /> <br />What does that require you to change?<br /> <br />What does that mean you have to let go of? <br /> <br />For me, I am challenged to live in the now. <br /> <br />God has blessed me today. So far, I woke up. My kids woke up. My hubby got to work safely. My hair worked. I had food to serve for breakfast. My car started and it had gas. My kids were laughing on the way to school. And so on.<br /> <br />We are compelled to take back that trust from the Lord when we start looking ahead in the future, aren't we? Isn't that when we lose our focus of Him? When the future looms so large in front of us, the answers aren't clear, the path is hidden, the "what ifs" are exhausting, we tend to take back that control from the Lord and try to figure it out on our own. <br /> <br />But ladies, that's not where He wants us. He doesn't want us in 2020, not even 2011, or even February 4th of 2010. He wants us present in TODAY. For every good thing we need, He will supply...for today. <br /> <br />And our worries, fears, anger, questions, frustrations, will do NOTHING to hurry God along. It won't change His course for our lives. It won't change His mind. It won't convince Him to take another path. <br /> <br />In fact, it might have the opposite effect. It will make His path harder as we drag our feet and throw our fits on the side of the road. (And yes, sometimes we are like toddlers demanding to have something go our way and refusing to see the wisdom in trusting our heavenly Father!)<br /> <br />We make our lives hard, don't we? We create chaos and doubt in our own minds, and we're nuts! At the very least, I am! <br /> <br />But reflect back on happiness...BEING happy. How can we possibly be happy when we're fighting God all the time? For we rob ourselves of His happiness, of His joy, because we are NOT living in the now. <br /> <br />So, today...take the road less traveled. Take the path that you would normal bypass. Choose to trust Him today, just for today, and He will prove you faithful. <br /> <br />And then tomorrow, we you wake up, trust Him again for that 24 hour period. Do this over and over again, until that trust overpowers your need for understanding, which is ultimately your need for control. <br /> <br />"Don't worry. Be happy." -Bobby McFerrin<br /> <br />Love you!Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-8286777089989640862010-01-29T17:05:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:06:51.514-08:00FilterGood early morning! <br /> <br />Call me neurotic, but I HATE being behind! I had a girlfriend say, "Better late than never." And part of me thought, "YEAH BUT even better if ON TIME!!" (Did you like the yabbit?? See, I can't even let myself of the hook!! Haaa!)<br /> <br />I'm prepping my heart for Titus 2 this morning, which I must say is a total blessing in my life. Not because it's a perfect Bible study, or the only Bible study, but because I can take what I hear and apply it immediately to my heart, my mind, my marriage, and my life. There are seasons in your life when you need this. You know those seasons where you're a hour-to-hour survival "case." That would be me! <br /> <br />I also love early mornings...a time to jump start the day...all to set the tone for my heart and mind. <br /> <br />Proverbs 29:11 "A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back." <br /> <br />Fool vs. the Wise<br /> <br />My favorite verses in Proverbs are the ones that clearly state fool vs. wise. Depending on the day, my mood, time of the month, how much my kids have beat me down (in the figurative sense, of course!), the amount of cash sits in my wallet, if my hair worked right, if Cliff noticed the hair working right, well, then, I can easily fall on either side of this proverb. Don't you think??<br /> <br />If only we were ALL fool or ALL wise! Don't you think it would be easier?<br /> <br />But it's not cut and dry like that. The truth is the majority of the time we're foolish, while achieving those moments of great wisdom. As we continue our walk with Him, placing Him at the helm of our ship, we gain small wise victories, which is only achieved by actually APPLYING His Word to our hearts and minds...and then exhibiting immense self-control. <br /> <br />Here's the difference:<br /> <br />Fool (Hebrew: keclyl): stupid fellow (I'll insert "girl"), dullard, simpleton, arrogant one. <br /> <br />Wise (Hebrew: chakam): skillful, learned, shrewd, prudent <br /> <br />So which side of the fence do you fall on most of the time? <br /> <br />Let's take a quick personal inventory. Just for a minut. Don't try to justify or excuse your behavior or thinking. Block out your hubby, kiddos, past, emotions...and just concentrate on you for a moment. <br /> <br />Pretend you are a stranger to your home standing in your living room watching yourself "playing" the role of the wife. You have no knowledge of the emotions and circumstances that fuel the wife's actions or words. You have no knowledge of the past events that may cause this craziness. You only see the wife's actions and hear her words. <br /> <br />What is your opinion of her? (Be honest with yourself, because it is in honesty that change can begin. It goes back to yesterday's devotional: step one is admission.) <br /> <br />What does her behavior say about her heart/character? (What assumptions would you make about her character based on her actions/words?)<br /> <br />What would you advise her if you could interact with her? (We all know it is MUCH easier to give advice to our friends...so why don't you see yourself as a friend?)<br /> <br />Oh, I know. I'm hurting too! Some days are great...some weeks are great...and then something goes snap, and I fall at great speed on the other side of the fence. With one leap I land on the foolish side...and again, it doesn't take much to get there.<br /> <br />Vent vs. Filter<br /> <br />In verse 11, I totally understand what the fool is doing: "A fool gives full vent to anger...(NLT)" or "A fool uttereth all his mind; (KJV)"<br /> <br />Bottom line: this fool lacks a filter between the her brain and her mouth. <br /> <br />The Hebrew root to "mind" is ruwach and literally means "breath of mouth; spirit; temper; anger; impatience; unaccountable or uncontrollable impulse." <br /> <br />Nothing is left unsaid. You think it, you say it. Maybe not at the moment, but it does come out regardless of the consequences. The only positive is the immediate relief that comes from unleashing those thoughts on someone else, which them pushes the responsibility of HOW they react to your words on them. It's then not our words that causes issues, it's THEIR reactions. And so the blame shifting begins. <br /> <br />True confession is that we all lose it. We all "vent" at some point. But the fool gives FULL vent and utters ALL his mind. Nothing is off limit. If he breathes, then he says. Imagine living with a person like that. Imagine raising a child like that (and no, this is not known as the teenage years!!). Imagine going through life like that. What destruction would occur? What relationships would we damage?<br /> <br />I venture to guess we'd be lonely, bitter old ladies after alienating every person in our life by our words and BEING alienated by other people's words, for you know eventually they'll start telling you what they think. It takes "Mean Girls" to a whole other level. <br /> <br />Proverbs 10:14 "Wise people store up knowledge, But the mouth of the foolish is near destruction."<br /> <br />Ecclesiastes 10:12 "The words of a wise man's mouth are gracious, But the lips of a fool shall swallow him up." <br /> <br />Swallow whole. Destruction. Ladies, it's not much clearer than this!<br /> <br />So for today, put this Proverb at the forefront of your mind. When your brain starts spinning arguments, criticisms, frustrations, take a deep breath, analyze the scenarios as the stranger standing in your living room, decide which side of the fence you will stand on, edit your thoughts (which will automatically edit your words), and quick write 5 blessings that happened to you TODAY! This will drastically change your focus from the chaos that you're ready to give in to, and turn it to His love and provision for you on an hourly basis!! <br /> <br />For a wise woman "quietly holds it back." <br /> <br />Lots of love! Here's to an amazing day filled with His glories! <br /> <br />RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-4275695583144455852010-01-28T17:03:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:05:11.458-08:00UncoverGood Afternoon, my Friends!<br /> <br />Happy happy weekend to you! <br /> <br />I'm so excited to be sitting in a clean house, with my hubby sound asleep in the next room after pulling an all-nighter, my kids watching "Up", and my heart at rest. It's not often that we ladies actually put aside all the commotion and circumstances swirling around in our every day lives, to just sit and rest in His grace and mercy. But I love Psalm 46:10a "Be still and know that I am God." For in the stillness, when all the world is shut out, we do KNOW that He is God. It's in the chaos of the world that we lose that focus and the power of that truth. <br /> <br />Proverbs 28...<br /> <br />13 People who conceal (cover) their sins will not prosper,<br /> but if they confess and turn from (forsake) them, they will receive mercy.<br /> <br />When I was reading this, I felt as though I had fallen into a hole I had dug for myself. "People who conceal their sins will not prosper..." Yowza! So, true confessions, this is totally me for most of the time...and as of late, I'm working on this huge! <br /> <br />So, take a deep breath and dive with me into the yuckiness of our pride and ego, and prepare to be challenged. For I don't know one woman who does not not struggle with this. <br /> <br />To conceal...to cover...to hide...(Hebrew verb: kacah). To try to erase something that should never have been in the first place. Isn't that what we convince ourselves as we're trying to cover our tracks?? <br /> <br />Why do we tend to cover something we have done? <br /> <br />The root for most excuses is pride. It is that pride that as a result hinders how we see the world, how we see our relationships, how we see our hearts (Mark 7:21-23 "For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, and evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man."), and how we see our God (Psalm 10:4 "The wicked in his proud countenance does not see God; God is in none of his thoughts."). <br /> <br />Let me say up front, that we may think we've covered our sins; but the truth is always discovered, no matter the time line, by those closest to us. <br /> <br />But more importantly, the Lord knows everything...every flit that goes through your mind, to every deed of your hand. He knows and sees it all. <br /> <br />Psalm 139:1-7 "Oh Lord, You have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my every thought when far away. You chart the path ahead of me and tell me where to stop and rest. Every moment You know where I am. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. You both precede and follow me. You place Your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to know! I can never escape from Your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence." <br /> <br />Here are some ways we may try and "cover" our sins...<br /> <br />1. Denial. Deception. For many this begins as a mind-game we play, not only with the people we're in relationship with, but ourselves. Denial is achieved through lying, whether out-right or by omission. For example, when Peter denied Christ three times before Christ's crucifixion. Scared, lonely, confused, Peter only proved Jesus right when he predicted Peter would deny him. (Matthew 27:69-75)<br /> <br />Think back to the last time you denied the truth (and that does include the whole truth and nothing but the truth) and the web you had to weave because you didn't just admit it in the first place. For once you tell one lie, you have to tell another to make the first one believable and to keep your lie from being uncovered. The more times we tell the lie, we actually rewrite reality in our own heads; and we actually start believing the lie is the truth. And on and on it goes, and forever you will live a life of lies. Where's the truth in that? <br /> <br />2. Justify. Excuse. Shift Blame. I think this is what we're famous for as women...our "yabbits." A yabbit is a "Yeah, but" said really fast, and mamas, we can spit those out like rapid fire. We've got a yabbit for every sin. Plain old cause and effect. For our sin is the effect; well then, what's the cause? And we find it, because we're on a mission to save our pride. You don't have to look farther than Eve (Gen. 3:1-13) to realize, somehow, we women don't fall far from that tree. Eve said, "The snake made me do it." Our kids may say, "My sister hit me first." We may say, "My hubby was mean first." And it goes on and on, and the excuses can potentially go on forever. But where's truth in a life full of excuses?<br /> <br />3. Naivete. When a person lacks wisdom, then sin invades undetected. There is no real foundation on which to base right and wrong for this person; and these people don't even know they've sinned. We see examples of these people all over Proverbs, known as the Fools...and we see examples all over history and our society. These are the people who fall deep into a hole and then wonder how they ever got there. <br /> <br />Think about Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10) up the tree. He didn't know right from wrong. His influence was the Roman government and the greed that surrounded his position. And yet, despite his lack of wisdom, somehow he was still compelled to climb a sycamore, look like a fool, to hopefully catch a glimpse of Christ. <br /> <br />We may not fall under this category, but someone in our lives might be struggling with this. More importantly, we know our kids fall under this category. This is why we must teach them wisdom (and more impactfully, model it for them). For a life lead by unwise actions, then create unwise reactions, and on and on it goes, potentially lasting forever. But where's His truth in an unwise life? <br />******************************<br />As a result of our "covering", we most likely experience the following in ourselves and therefore impact our relationships with our spouse. Notice the building of scenarios. <br /> <br />-Guilt: Because we know what we did was wrong, we then look for redemption through other means other than admitting the truth. May be super sweet, fix favorite meals, etc. Also, the guilt may trickle into remorse and self-loathing, which then turns into self-anger...and left undone, that anger is then turned on those closest to you. <br /> <br />-Tension: Having an underlying sense of uncertainty in your home, where you are the only one who knows the root. Your spouse remains clueless, except that you are distant. Not dealt with, this tension very quickly turns into irritation. <br /> <br />-Irritation: The whole point is to focus on the little things in your hubby's behavior that bug you. This gives you "permission" to act out some of that tension you've been harboring for yourself, most likely passive-aggressively (sighs, body language, eye rolls, purposeful thoughtlessness). The reason tension easily leads into irritation is that we must attack first before your hubby attacks you. Deflection is the name of the game. <br /> <br />-Aggressive Anger: If your hubby hasn't cornered you yet on what is bothering you, aggressive anger will always get his attention. This is the visible, audible "I'm angry and not trying to control or hide it" stage of covering sins. Destruction is the point of this. The truth is that your spirit is destroyed on the inside, so why not destroy everything good on the outside. <br /> <br />All of these lead AWAY from prosperity...and instead lead STRAIGHT to misery. <br /> <br />So, my girls...what to take from this, other than a cold hard look of the inner workings of our heart, is this: (Assume the injured person is your hubby.)<br /> <br />1. Admit to yourself you were wrong. Own it. We want to own all the good in our life. But with the good, also comes with owning the bad. <br /> <br />2. Confess to the Lord and then to your spouse you wronged. Do it with a heart of contrition, honesty, and remorse. It's okay to allow yourself to be broken over something. It's actually vital because it is part of the growing process. <br /> <br />3. Ask for forgiveness from the Lord and from your dear hubby. I think this is a major step that society overlooks (and that as moms we should be teaching our kiddos to do). To ask for forgiveness, gives the "victim' the right to respond to the apology and to embrace the "aggressor" after all is done. Forgiveness allows for complete healing.<br /> <br />4. RECEIVE forgiveness. For many of us, this is a process of being broken and when our actions affect those we love, quite often, we don't forgive ourselves. But we must, for He has forgiven us, and our hubby has forgiven as well. Do not negate their forgiveness. <br />This is possibly the greatest gift you could give the relationship: the ability to start with a fresh slate. <br /> <br />5. Analyze the root issue for why you did what you did. For a lesson not learned from is a big waste of time. Right? It's like watching your kiddos make the same mistake over and over and you telling them, "How many times do I have to tell you this?" I wonder how many times the Lord things that of us?<br /> <br />6. Finally, make the necessary adjustment in your heart, your mind, and your actions, that will allow you to choose correctly in the future. Lesson learned. Wouldn't this be an amazing victory??<br /> <br />Check out Psalm 32:1-11, a Psalm written by David after he had the affair with Bathsheba and had her hubby Uriah conveniently "whaked" so David could marry her (and you thought the Bible was devoid of drama!!). But this Psalm is all about the joy experienced after being forgiven by the Lord. Amen!! <br /> <br />Ladies...I write this from a humble heart that has been there, done that in all of these ways! We are here together: loving one another, loving our families, loving our kiddos, and loving our God!<br /> <br />Have an amazing evening!!<br /> <br />With love and utter respect-<br /> <br />RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-45932158922320019762010-01-27T17:02:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:03:46.067-08:00Be LightTo My Favorite Girls in the Whole World:<br /> <br />As I read Proverbs 27, there were so many amazing nuggets to grab hold of and apply to our lives, but I want to go somewhere easy. Easy on the eyes, easy on the heart, and easy on the soul. <br /> <br />We have been working so hard in the past month on making over our hearts and minds, that sometimes we lose track of the awesomeness of being in a community of believing women. And then I read Proverbs 27:9!<br /> <br />9 The heartfelt counsel of a friend<br /> is as sweet as perfume and incense. <br />I love the sweetness of this verse...not only literal sweetness, but the sweetness of an amazing friend. You know, those friends who are going to come alongside you, cry with you, hold your hand, give you unbelievable advice, and then let you know that they've been there too! <br /> <br />Our hubbies are amazing in their own rights! But I don't know one wife out there that treats her man like a girlfriend. If Cliff were to listen to all my wonders, thoughts, bumps in the road, and funny girl stories, he would probably run far far away! (And my hubby is a very patient man when it comes to listening to me.) <br /> <br />And God, in His infinite wisdom and knowledge of the differences between men and women, has provided women around each one of us, not only to love on us, but to be that faithful friend who is not afraid to instruct IN love. And that's what makes it sweet.<br /> <br />For, He continues in Proverbs 27:17<br /> <br /> 17 As iron sharpens iron,<br /> so a friend sharpens a friend.<br /> <br />We are in a community to grow one another, push one another to become better moms, wives, friends, and followers of Christ. Iron sharpening iron is NOT easy, nor free from hurt; but in the end, the smooth surface that comes from it is so worth it. <br /> <br />And notice, that it's not one iron sharpening another...they're both being sharpened at the same time, even if you aren't aware! <br /> <br />A woman cannot survive alone. We thrive on relationships with those around us. We understand the world through relationships. We develop opinions, character, thoughts, faith through the people around us (not always good people, but people none-the-less). And we are living on earth what our relationship should be with our heavenly Father. <br /> <br />We are designed to be in relationship with Him, all the time, every day, in all circumstances. We are to turn to Him in good and bad, joys and sorrows, sickness and health, richer or poorer...for He is our sustainer. And it is those good friends who will remind us of that!<br /> <br />Today take a moment to send one friend (whether Christian or non-Christian) who you haven't been in contact with recently, a note of gratitude and encouragement. Whether a text message, email, or Facebook message, take the time to encourage another girl in her life's journey. <br /> <br />For this is God's calling for each of us...to go into all the world and be His light. <br /> <br />Here's to being that sweet aroma to one another!<br /> <br />In His love and grace:<br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-67790207268940385382010-01-26T17:00:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:02:29.353-08:00Baby StepsDear Mama Friends...<br /> <br />I must apologize first off for this being two days late. I sat to write this, got half way through, and had a complete mental block. Ugh! So I'm picking off where my brain left off...so just pretend it's Tuesday! It will do my guilt wonders! HEEE!!<br /> <br />************************************<br /> <br />I am sitting in the house, Cliff and Keegan out running errands, and Makena taking a nap, and yet I can't get my thoughts to steady. It might by General Hospital playing in the background (let's call it a guilty distraction), or the fact that my refrigerator fan is broken and creating its own jackhammer noise. I am practicing instant gratitude while secretly dreading the next two days waiting for the part to come in!! Oh, mama! I might be crazy by Thursday morning! :) <br /> <br />I woke up this morning with this amazing feeling that God is so in control of absolutely everything...and He places those people around us that we need every day. I am humbled and honored to not only call you my friends, but to call you my sisters-in-Christ. Please know I know nothing more than you. I have no secrets. I have no special formulas. I only have the Lord...and an amazing group of women who stand together with me for His cause. Hugs!! <br /> <br />Proverbs 26...<br /> <br />v. 13 The lazy person is full of excuses, saying, "I can't go outside because there might be a lion on the road! Yes, I'm sure there's a lion out there!"<br /> <br />Now, before you jump to "wait, I'm not lazy...have you seen my daily schedule? The fact is I don't have time to sit, let alone shower", I promise this will all make sense. Hang in there with me. For wisdom sometimes comes when you drop your defensive walls, open your heart and eyes, and unpack a verse one sentence at a time. <br /> <br />And let me reassure you, I so get it! From 6am to midnight, it is non-stop in my world; probably the most "still" I get is blowing dry my hair, standing in my tiny shower, or indulging in my tivo'ed shows. (This means I can condense a 60 minute show to 20 minutes! Try watching The Bachelor on DVR speed! It's actually tolerable!) <br /> <br />So, instead of focusing on the “lazy” qualification, I want us to look at the excuses this “lazy” girl uses.<br /> <br />**For the sake of this email, I’m going to assume the lazy person’s a girl. It will help us to identify…promise!<br /> <br />First I love that she’s having a conversation with herself. Do you notice nobody else is around to give her a reality check? Do you notice that she's not even seeking a reality check? She doesn't care what is truth. For the reality in her mind will ultimately justify her inaction and allow her to bypass what she's called to do in the first place. <br /> <br />When I read this, there was a part of me that chuckled at the ridiculous cowardice that consumes this lazy girl. From a third-person perspective (that always sees more clearly than if you were in the mix), I thought, “wait…you CAN'T because you THINK there MIGHT be a lion out there?? You don’t even KNOW???” <br /> <br />And that made me realize that fear is an amazing thing. Amazingly debilitating. It controls not only our actions, but it consumes our heart, squelches our faith, and takes away our need for a Savior. Fear gives permission for our personal shell to close up, so we can avoid all that ultimately might hurt us.<br /> <br />Let me take a bold stand and say, I believe that all laziness and general inaction is ultimately borne of fear. A fear of “what if.” A fear of failure. A fear of rejection. A fear of the unknown. A fear of loss. A fear of success. A fear of growth. A fear of discomfort. A fear of wasted effort. <br /> <br />The excuses we must come up with to justify the inaction must ultimately justify those fears so we don't sound like crazy girls stunted by our own wackiness. Ultimately we sabotage ourselves...and more importantly, our God. <br /> <br />Let me give you some examples: <br /> <br />My mother-in-law, who I love dearly, will never go to the doctor because she fears the news she might receive. So she hobbles around on a knee that needs replacing, which then restricts her interaction and activity with those around her. <br /> <br />My sister-in-law's friend has a 15-month-old child and has never left her "baby" once. EVER. She has turned down her hubby's invitation for dates, weekends away, time to go to the hairdresser. She doesn't shower, except to rinse off. And she has no relationship with anyone other than her baby. What fear is driving that? (And don't you want to run over to her house, take her under your wing, and then kidnap her for a weekend getaway??) <br /> <br />The old lady portrayed on the show Hoarders (yes, I watch it because it makes my house look AWESOME!!) is so afraid to give up her junk because it will leave her with an empty house and an empty heart. The fear of the future is more debilitating than the filth she resides in. <br /> <br />I have 9 unwritten books in my head and on index cards that I cart around with me in a pink accordion folder every where I go, but have not had the courage to write any of them down. Why? Because I fear failure. I don't like to do anything that I will not be good at. How stunting is that?? <br /> <br />What is fear stopping you from doing today? <br /> <br />Take a moment to answer that. What would you do today if you had NO fear? <br /> <br />I love the second portion of this lazy girl's excuse...not only does she think there's a lion outside her door, but in one heart beat now she KNOWS!!! <br /> <br />One of Cliff's biggest complaints of me is that I make assumptions about nearly everything, especially when I'm in a quandary about life. I jump to conclusions, and those conclusions then dictate how I feel, act, and react. <br /> <br />Please tell me I'm not alone! <br /> <br />For this lazy girl isn't leaving her house to go anywhere because there IS a lion outside her door. <br /> <br />How foolish will she feel when someone comes to see her, and she asks how they got past the lion? Can you imagine the look on their face? "WHAT LION??" <br /> <br />We women easily take one thought and spin it into truth. Not only does that hurt our perspective on life, our potential, our relationships, but ultimately it is an affront on God and who He is.<br /> <br />For, ladies, what is faith? <br /> <br />Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." <br /> <br />2 Corinthians 5:7 "For we walk by faith, not by sight." <br /> <br />For our Lord IS faithful. He loved us before we loved Him. He has brought us through the fires and continues to do so because He is molding us for His use...His glory...His purpose. He is bigger than any fear we may have...bigger than that lion resting outside your door. And through Him, all things are possible.<br /> <br />So, what are you going to do today to step outside your comfort zone? What are you going to do that's out of your control? What dreams are you going to take a step towards? What thoughts do you need to take captive in order to achieve these things? Who are you going to tell so you create accountability? And what fear are you going to let go of? <br /> <br />Baby steps. <br /> <br />Lots of love ladies! Again, I am so grateful to you and for you...for your love, encouragement, friendship, and joy!<br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-58268625964535492010-01-25T16:58:00.000-08:002010-03-07T17:00:33.226-08:00One Day at a TimeHey girlies! <br /> <br />I hope you are well this bright, sunshiny day! :) I love the calm before the storm, at least when it comes to the weather! It always forces me to enjoy this day and to use to its full extent! <br /> <br />What an awesome week God has planned for us! I encourage you, as you go through the daily "grind" of being a mommy, a wife, a homemaker, an employee, a student, a friend, a taxicab driver, that you pause in those quiet moments and dwell on the blessings the Lord has provided for you. <br /> <br />How quickly our minds go to the negative: the overwhelming, the boring, the icky, the frustrating, the maddening things that seem to weigh heavily on our shoulders. And yet, when we put the effort forth to flip our thoughts and see things through His perspective, we ARE blessed!! Even in my squeaky car...with my larger-than-life rear...and not enough time in the day to feel on top of things...we are BLESSED! <br /> <br />If you doubt that, turn on Fox News and watch a few stories about Haiti...and allow yourself to take in the images in their raw hurt and chaotic desperation. For no matter, what we have or don't have...we are blessed. For our hearts rest in His peace and understanding. If you don't feel awesome now, give yourself an hour of good wrestling with the circumstances surrounding your life, lay down at His feet all your iniquities, and allow Jesus to take up your cross and carry it at least through this evening. <br /> <br />One day at a time, mamas! Just one day at a time. As Kim often says, "New mercies every morning...His mercies are new every morning..." and for that matter every hour, every minute that we choose to stop what we're doing, listen to His leading, and choose His path instead. Ladies, it all boils down to self-control...and that's where we're going today! <br /> <br />Proverbs 25:28<br /> <br />"A person without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls." <br /> <br />Sometimes when I watch reality tv (which is almost all my shows...I know, it's a sick addiction, but at least I haven't stooped down to Jersey Shore!!), you can see the results of the lack of self-control all over the place. On The Bachelor, the girls are so desperate to get the man they think they want, that they will behave in the most unabashed and ridiculous ways. On Tough Love, a dating show where the matchmaker tries to "fix" the girls with typical dating problems, the girls lack so much confidence in who they are that they become easily hurt, volatile, and succumb to random and idiotic (in my humble opinion) emotional outbursts. On the Real Housewives of Anywhere, the women all lose sight of the line between right and wrong, and what is truly important (like marriage and kids) and spend all their time trying to justify their unwise words and actions. And to wrap it up, on Celebrity Rehab, you can watch those who have truly lost complete control to substance abuse attempt to make sense of the craziness they have created for themselves. (Living with 30 birds and having no human contact for 60 days is NOT sane!!)<br /> <br />So, we might not be on a reality show, but if there was a film crew in your home, what craziness would we all see because of your lack of control? Last week, in my home, there would have been some great drama...all based on my lack of control. Seriously! <br /> <br />For self-control is what protects us from the constant onslaught of temptation. It is what keeps us contained, structured, and safe. Walls allow life to carry on as it should be within the city without worrying about what's going on on the outside. Walls were designed to keep the people in, while keeping the enemy out. <br /> <br />Think about The Lord of the Rings movies and the walls that surrounded each city: thick, layered, the first place where the enemy is spotted from, also the first place where the enemy attacks, rooted deep in the ground and extending high into the sky. It is the first line of defense, but it also defines who we are. The character and integrity of our strength is shown by the construction of that wall. <br /> <br />But when our self-control lacks, there becomes a hole, a weak spot by which we invite the angst of life to get a hold of our hearts. For inside our city wall lies our heart and soul.<br /> <br />In order to create a strong wall, you must lay a foundation. A foundation on which nothing will shake. And girls, that is the Word of the Lord. His words are our rock on which we can build a strong and sturdy wall. That is the wisdom and understanding that comes from a knowing relationship from the Lord. All we are is rooted in who He is. <br /> <br />As we understand more and more wisdom, we are able to discern right from wrong, temptation from desire, admission from justification. We are able to learn self-control, first, in our thoughts and intentions, which is the exhibited through self-control in our words and actions. It's an inward transformation which is then manifested outwardly in all we do. And that is where the strength of the walls lie...in the layer upon layer of Scripture we have applied to our hearts (see Friday's email) that then transform our behavior. <br /> <br />When we are at the center of our city with the walls as fortified as possible, we may be attacked, but the attack will have no bearing on our well-being. We are mildly shaken, but not toppled. We are concerned, but not lost. For we know we are protected by the One who has even defeated death. What can be lost? <br /> <br />Self-control, mamas. This next verse sums it up: <br /> <br />2 Peter 1:5-8 "So make every effort to apply the benefits of these promises to your life. Then your faith will produce a life of moral excellence. A life of moral excellence leads to knowing God better. Knowing God leads to self-control. Self-control leads to patient endurance, and patient endurance leads to godliness. Godliness leads to love for other Christians (brotherly love), and finally you will grow to have genuine love for everyone. The more you grow like this, the more you will become productive and useful in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ." <br /> <br />We are on a journey. You must start somewhere. You must know that patience is required. And it is guaranteed that you will stumble and fall. But it is He who picks us back up, dusts us off, gives us a kiss, redirects or re-instructs us, and sends us on our way. <br /> <br />So today, bite your tongue just once. Maybe walk away before you say something out-of-control; or maybe put yourself in a time out; and while secluded, read a verse of two, confess your struggle to the Lord, ask for His strength, take one deep breath, and leave the room with the conviction of starting over. New mercies, girls. New mercies!<br /> <br />Love!! <br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-13043879645816580842010-01-22T16:57:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:58:52.659-08:00The Foundation of WisdomGood Friday Morning Ladies!!<br /> <br />How excited are you that it's almost the weekend? Thrilled I can imagine! ;) <br /> <br />I kept my little chickadees home with me today, mostly for selfish reasons. And I was honestly just looking for a little quality time with the two of them before the chaos of the weekend ensues. I'm not one for homeschooling (I and/or my children would not survive the experience, quite literally), but I can definitely see the comfort in it.<br /> <br />Proverbs 22...<br /> <br />I actually prepped for v. 3,<br /> <br />3 A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions.<br /> The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences. <br /><br /> <br /><br />but I'm now liking v. 17-18 for today. <br /><br /> <br /><br />If you look at the section of the Proverb that we're beginning to read through (and that will last through Proverbs 24:22), it's summarizes "Thirty Sayings of the Wise." I have to laugh, because I feel as though we've had days and days of wise sayings...but if Solomon was to boil it all down, well, here you go. <br /><br /> <br /><br />As for the format, the points are divided into paragraphs, and the great thing about these, is he includes some explanation behind each to further drive home his point. I, for one, love explanation because it reinforces the concept for me. Let's just say, my head is a little harder than others' and I need to hear it time and time again before it actually sinks in! <br /><br /> <br /><br />He kicks off the 30 wise points with v. 17 and 18. <br /><br /> <br /><br />17 Listen to the words of the wise;<br /> apply your heart to my instruction.<br />18 For it is good to keep these sayings in your heart<br /> and always ready on your lips.<br /> <br />So, my friends, I love these two verses because this is the foundation of wisdom. This is how wisdom goes from words on a page to changing lives. <br /> <br />On a side note, I would love to have these two verses hanging above my kitchen doors, tattooed on my forehead (backwards, of course, so I could read it when I looked in the mirror), and in big bold letters on the cover of my Bible. Personally, I think these two verses should be the general intro to Proverbs (not that the Bible is fallible, because it's not being God-breathed and all!) because without these two verses, then reading Proverbs, or anything else in the Bible, will do nothing for you except become another task on your checklist and a waste of your time. <br /> <br />This sounds harsh, but you have to ask yourself "why" you are reading your Bible. Why are you reading Proverbs? Are you reading to feel like a better Christian, or are you reading to transform your life? Are you reading so you can hold it above your hubby's head that you're more dedicated than he, or are you reading to better YOUR character and YOUR faith with our God? Are you reading because you always have and to skip would be to abandon a routine that seems to "work" some days, or are you reading so that you can wash yourself in His Word and glorify Him in your actions daily? <br /> <br />These are hard truths to face. I know I've done devotions blindly and remained unchanged. But if your heart is invested, the Lord can do anything! <br /> <br />Step One: LISTEN<br /> <br />How many of us listen? Really listen, not just hear? For listening is not the same as hearing. It's like hearing your kids talking...you hear them, but you are not tuned in to be comprehending what they're saying. So you hear, "blah, blah, blah." But if you listened you might hear, "I don't like you. Get out." And then you can tend to the issues. But things left unlistened to, become the seeds that all problems grow out from. <br /> <br />Have you ever been in a conversation with your hubby and he's telling you things he wishes you would do...and you tune out? Or you start writing a grocery list in your head? Or you start noticing all the things wrong with the room you're sitting in? Me too! <br /> <br />Have you ever read your Bible and then "wake up" two chapters later because your mind has wandered all over the place? Sometimes it reminds me of being in college and dutifully but "uninvestedly" reading my text books. And the reason I would justify tuning out was "I will never use this in real life because it has nothing to do with me." <br /> <br />Nice. Nice and self-centered. Nice and ignorant. Nice and naive. For to treat the Bible in the same fashion is ultimately to blasphemy His Word. Ouch. I know...it's Friday. I should probably go easy! But, over this weekend, I really want you to look at your intentions. What are your motives? For if they're not genuine FOR YOU, then this is all for naught. <br /> <br />Step Two: TO THE WORDS OF THE WISE<br /> <br />"Be careful little ears what you hear....Be careful little ears what you hear...for the Father up above is looking down in love...Be careful little ears what you hear." <br /> <br />This is a song Makena sings in Awana and I love it. What are we listening to? Who are we listening to? Because what and who determines our outlook and understanding of life. <br /> <br />Are we listening to the Real Housewives of the O.C. where boobs, money, and bling equate happiness? Are we listening to Oprah and the Universe when it comes to finding peace? Are we listening to our non-Christian girlfriends when they say, "oh, no big deal; just leave him; you're better than him anyway?" <br /> <br />Who are we listening to???? And what are they saying???? <br /> <br />And how do you know if what you hear is wise? You can always compare it to Scripture. If throughout the Bible, what you're being told is supported, then it is wise. If is is contradictory to is, then it is not. It is very plain and simple. <br /> <br />Step Three: APPLY YOUR HEART TO MY INSTRUCTION<br /> <br />Apply...think of His instruction like facial cream for your heart. Lather it, smear it, layer it in a thick coat all over your heart. For your heart affects how you see reality and therefore how you interact with others. The goal is to see reality and your life as clearly as God sees it. For only then is wisdom possible. <br /> <br />You have to transform your heart, because if you only alter your behavior, it will only be temporary. It will only last for a week or two. Instead, you have to change the root of your being in order for the change to be lasting. <br /> <br />We are so on our way, girls! We may be wrestling with things in our own lives in individual circumstances that cause us to doubt, waver, and at times choose our own paths. But we are in pursuit of Him! And this will never go unnoticed by our heavenly Father! <br /> <br />For He is after us with a vengeance. He loves us, more than you love your little chickadees. He wants to protect us, more than we want to save our kiddos. And He has given His Son to cover our sins...the greatest gift ever. At times the goodness of God and His sacrifice for my life is completely incomprehensible to me! I stand in awe!<br /> <br />So, girls, sorry for this not being so light! I didn't even tackle v.18 for this was heavy!<br /> <br />I love you...am so grateful for this journey we are on together...and stand in awe of His wisdom as we grow!<br /> <br />Have a great weekend! <br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-58266919933784928712010-01-21T16:57:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:57:54.899-08:00Your TurnTo my Favorite People in the Whole World!<br /> <br />I wanted to take a break hearing from me for a day. And instead, wanted to hear from you.<br /> <br />I've pasted the entire Proverb 21 below, and ask that you forward it back to me with comments underneath a verse or two that stuck out to you. <br /> <br />I'll compile our insight collectively, make all contributions anonymous, and we'll see how we, as sisters in Christ, are learning and growing in His Word! <br /> <br />Can't wait to hear your thoughts!<br /> <br />Love!! Rebecca<br /> <br />************************************<br />Proverbs 21<br />1 The king's heart is like a stream of water directed by the Lord ;<br /> he guides it wherever he pleases.<br /><br />2 People may be right in their own eyes,<br /> but the Lord examines their heart.<br /><br />3 The Lord is more pleased when we do what is right and just<br /> than when we offer him sacrifices.<br /><br />4 Haughty eyes, a proud heart,<br /> and evil actions are all sin.<br /><br />5 Good planning and hard work lead to prosperity,<br /> but hasty shortcuts lead to poverty.<br /><br />6 Wealth created by a lying tongue<br /> is a vanishing mist and a deadly trap.s<br /><br />7 The violence of the wicked sweeps them away,<br /> because they refuse to do what is just.<br /><br />8 The guilty walk a crooked path;<br /> the innocent travel a straight road.<br /><br />9 It's better to live alone in the corner of an attic<br /> than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.<br /><br />10 Evil people desire evil;<br /> their neighbors get no mercy from them.<br /><br />11 If you punish a mocker, the simpleminded become wise;<br /> if you instruct the wise, they will be all the wiser.<br /><br />12 The Righteous Ones knows what is going on in the homes of the wicked;<br /> he will bring disaster on them.<br /><br />13 Those who shut their ears to the cries of the poor<br /> will be ignored in their own time of need.<br /><br />14 A secret gift calms anger;<br /> a bribe under the table pacifies fury.<br /><br />15 Justice is a joy to the godly,<br /> but it terrifies evildoers.<br /><br />16 The person who strays from common sense<br /> will end up in the company of the dead.<br /><br />17 Those who love pleasure become poor;<br /> those who love wine and luxury will never be rich.<br /><br />18 The wicked are punished in place of the godly,<br /> and traitors in place of the honest.<br /><br />19 It's better to live alone in the desert<br /> than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife.<br /><br />20 The wise have wealth and luxury,<br /> but fools spend whatever they get.<br /><br />21 Whoever pursues righteousness and unfailing love<br /> will find life, righteousness, and honor.<br /><br />22 The wise conquer the city of the strong<br /> and level the fortress in which they trust.<br /><br />23 Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut,<br /> and you will stay out of trouble.<br /><br />24 Mockers are proud and haughty;<br /> they act with boundless arrogance.<br /><br />25 Despite their desires, the lazy will come to ruin,<br /> for their hands refuse to work.<br /><br />26 Some people are always greedy for more,<br /> but the godly love to give!<br /><br />27 The sacrifice of an evil person is detestable,<br /> especially when it is offered with wrong motives.<br /><br />28 A false witness will be cut off,<br /> but a credible witness will be allowed to speak.<br /><br />29 The wicked bluff their way through,<br /> but the virtuous think before they act.<br /><br />30 No human wisdom or understanding or plan<br /> can stand against the Lord .<br /><br />31 The horse is prepared for the day of battle,<br /> but the victory belongs to the Lord .Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-53762675145992373092010-01-20T16:55:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:57:08.574-08:00Director of Our StepsGood Morning girls!!<br /> <br />I thought I should start with this particular verse this morning, since yesterday morning did not go as planned for me...and you did not receive this email as I had intended! :) Let's just say being sick does not have its benefits!<br /> <br />So let me dive right in...Proverbs 20:24<br /> <br />24 The Lord directs our steps,<br /> so why try to understand everything along the way?<br /> <br />Honestly, girls, whose path are we choosing each and every day? <br /> <br />Are we forcing our own way? Or are we actually putting our trust in Him hour by hour and allowing Him to lead, guide, direct our actions, words, and thoughts, ultimately for His glory?<br /> <br />Answer these questions to find out: <br /> <br />1. Do you turn off your God sensor in the heat of the moment? <br />2. Do you assume you know what God is doing when He seems to allow fires in our lives? <br />3. Do you sit and try to figure out His rhyme and reason for allowing things to happen?<br />4. Do you get so caught up with getting answers that when you don't get them, you are paralyzed in thought and in faith (like a scratched CD skipping the same note over and over and you can't get past it)? <br />5. Do you demand to know what it all means and when you don't, you become combative, irritated, annoyed, angry and then take it out on the person that is involved in the situation with you? <br />6. After the fact, do you look back and see the needlessness of the chaos you just created for yourself? <br />7. Have you ever felt the desperateness of trying to figure things out and in order to do so try to fit the situation into the scenario in your head, knowing in your heart that your probably wrong?? <br /> <br />I know! Me too!!<br /> <br />Let's just say, that since writing these thoughts on Proverbs, my brain has been forced to wrap itself around the root spiritual issues that do not come easy. And the root of this Proverb is trust. Trust in a God who knows best. Trust in a God who has your best interests at heart and who want to bless you mightily! Trust in God's plan for your life, whether you get it or not! <br /> <br />Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Seek His will in all your ways and He will direct your path." <br /> <br />From a human perspective, trust is not easy. It does not come naturally to most of us. Especially if the people around us on earth have failed us in the past. (And if they haven't yet, well, they're bound to in the future. Right?) And when we DON'T understand the why of what is happening, that makes trust almost an impossible thing because humanly we can't make sense of the situation. <br /> <br />But the Lord is so different, for He cares for us inside and out, from the minute to the grandiose. He will not let us down or let us go. He is beside us no matter what. And nothing will separate us from His love. <br /> <br />One of my favorite Psalms is 139:1-24. If you ever doubt God's investment in YOU, just read this! <br /> <br />Psalm 37:23-24 "The steps of the godly are directed by the Lord. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will not fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand." <br /> <br />For God knows all things throughout the continuum of time and space...the past and the future are one story line to Him, with no gaps, no breaks, no unanswered questions, or undone deeds. We all play a role in His story ("His story = history"...I know you've heard that before, but the 6th grade history teacher in me just came out with a vengeance) and it is He who is directing our path, whether we acknowledge it or not. (I will say, things seem to get a little easier when we surrender our will to His...and fires that we must walk through will refine us, but not burn us.) <br /> <br />Today, just today, see if you can give up that whirring in your brain that has to make everything "make sense" to YOU. See if you can keep your mind from jumping ahead a week, a month, a year, a decade...and instead live in the moment. See if you can love those in your path TODAY regardless of what they've done in the past or going to do in the future. And see if you can allow God, THE GOD who created the universe and who knows how many hairs you have on your head, to take the place as the HEAD of your life and the head of your heart. <br /> <br />Our God is greater than the pain, the questions, and the frustrations of this life. We don't need to know why or even how...all we need to know is that He uses all things for the good of those who love Him and live according to His purpose (paraphrased Romans 8:28). <br /> <br />This is my prayer for your heart today, as well as mine.<br /> <br />Love Mamas!! Enjoy this rain if you're in SoCal! <br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-77054855317877962572010-01-19T16:53:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:55:21.464-08:00One Foot In Front Of The OtherTo My Happy Happy Girls! <br /> <br />I so hope you had an amazing long, long weekend full of family time, romantic moments stolen with your hubby, and maybe just some time for yourself and your Lord! I hope you are refreshed and ready for the week! <br /> <br />To be quite honest with you, my weekend was rough. It was mainly rough because I am my own worst enemy. My hubby would be testimony to that. My expectations, my assumptions, and my interpretation of reality can be so twisted from the truth. And then all following events are based upon that second dimension and I might as well be living on another planet! <br /> <br />I found it quite ironic that this Proverb charted my path this weekend perfectly...<br /> <br />Step One: <br /> <br />3 People ruin their lives by their own foolishness<br /> and then are angry at the Lord.<br /> <br />Oh, girls! Are we all right here at one moment or another? I will say that my own foolishness could have ruined a whole future. My foolishness tends to wrap around my wrong assumptions of what has happened in the past and my false expectations of what is to come. I could probably have an entire relationship with myself and all the thoughts that fly through my head. Wouldn't that be hilarious? Or tragically sad! <br /> <br />But take that craziness we can create for ourselves one step further, and instead of taking a good hard look at the reality we made on our own, we deny responsibility and blame it on the Lord. That blame can look like anger, indifference, or even stifling sadness... because we just don't take a good long look in the mirror. <br /> <br />I was forced to do so this weekend. To see myself through someone else's eyes (which definitely cuts down on the foolishness, as long as you are listening to their point-of-view with a open heart and mind), to acknowledge his honesty, and then to digest and act upon his observations. For consistent action is the true proof of a changed heart. <br /> <br />Step Two: <br /> <br />20 Get all the advice and instruction you can,<br /> so you will be wise the rest of your life.<br /> <br />As this weekend kept going down, and I mean south...down...far from good, I turned to some trusted girlfriends who I knew would keep me grounded and hold me to the standards of the Lord. And it was those girls who posed the right questions and the right kind words, who kept me from my own foolishness. <br /> <br />Wisdom. Wisdom is all around us...and we have been given amazing girlfriends and mentors; we have been given spouses who care for our best and for our marriage's best; and we have the Lord, the King of all Wisdom, instructing us directly in very plain and clear terms what wisdom holds in store for us. <br /> <br />So, open up those hearts and minds to what is around you. For God is good..."get ALL the advice and instruction you CAN." Pretend your at an all-you-can-eat wisdom buffet and eat up mamas! It's calorie free, open 24 hours a day, and will leave you more filled to the depths of your soul than any other substitute in this life. <br /> <br />Step Three:<br /><br />21 You can make many plans,<br /> but the Lord 's purpose will prevail.<br /> <br />Here's the tale of how I knew that I remained in the palm of the Lord's hand, even if I was, and still am, unwise. <br /> <br />At church Sunday morning, the benediction was all about the Lord's peace...peace that surrounds a soul that only comes from Him. And that's when I shed my first set of tears. For the Lord was speaking directly to my heart of unrest. <br /> <br />I knew I needed to talk to my hubby and ultimately apologize to him, but didn't what to dive into it when the kids were home. Then stepped in my mom who called and asked if the kids could come over to "play" at their house. Let me just say that my parents have never once in 6 years ever asked for my kids to come over to their house unprovoked. So, that was God, undeniably.<br /> <br />Kids gone, Cliff and I talked. And I had to pray through the whole two hours. Pray that my ears were open, my heart was open, my mind was open (I kept silently repeating to myself over and over his key points to make sure I would remember them), and that I would keep my defensive walls down. I had to stop that part of my brain that immediately thinks of arguments to counteract each of Cliff's points. And that was only through His strength.<br /> <br />As the conversation was coming to an end, there were things that I wanted to hear from Cliff to set my heart at ease, but was sure he'd never say. I prayed and prayed and listened. And within the two hours, my hubby's heart was turned and all my concerns were washed away. If you don't know my man, well let me say he's 1/2 German and 1/2 Italian, and there is little that actually changes his mind once it's made. But God did. God did without him knowing. Because ladies, God changed me first. <br /> <br />The conversation ended well. The relationship was restored. We sat eating soup, when my mom called and said that Keegan wanted to spend the night at their house and had already packed his pillow, blanket, and stuffed animal in his bag without me knowing. So, the grandparents, who never ever have my kids over, now wanted to keep them OVERNIGHT...which gave Cliff and I a "stay-cation." <br /> <br />So, here's the deal...my plans were nothing compared to what God had in store. The "Lord's purposes will prevail." How awesome is that? Even working through my 6-year-old son, my 63-year-old mother, my two emailing-like-cray girlfriends, and my amazing hubby who loves me despite my foolishness. God is good. <br /> <br />Girls...one foot in front of the other no matter what the circumstances. Gird yourselves with the wisdom of His Word and the wisdom of those around you. Keep your hearts open to Him. Keep His Word at the forefront of your thoughts. And allow Him to guide you even though you may not be certain of the outcome, for He is amazing!<br /> <br />Love love love!! Here's to a great week!<br /> <br />If you're in town, Titus 2 tomorrow morning 9ish to 10:45, childcare provided at Grace Baptist...the most amazing (in my humble opinion) women's Bible study. It's on submission...so come to be challenge in the most personal and unbelievable way! <br /> <br />Rebecca :)Livvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-43423875279293972232010-01-15T16:52:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:53:45.255-08:00Pray, Obey, RepeatLet me be the first to congratulate you on surviving the week and really putting the Lord first in your thoughts. <br /> <br />Five days, ladies, and to say I have not been challenged every day, would be a lie. <br /> <br />My intentions and my actions do NOT match, and I am working on self-control. Isn't that a fruit of the spirit?? Wouldn't it be lovely if my fruit tree actually grew self-control?! Haa! I am willing, the Lord is very willing. Let's just see if I can squash all the muck and reality that gets in the way of my willingness! <br /> <br />So thank you so much for going on this journey with me! If any of you have feedback, thoughts, ponderings, I'd love to hear them! Email, text, or call anytime! <br /> <br />One of my dearest friends in the whole world wrote me this yesterday, and I loved it. What I say in 10 paragraphs, she says in one! <br /> <br />"Rebecca – I saw a billboard yesterday that really spoke to my heart. It read, “your past may be stained but your future is spotless.” This gives me hope as I face a new day. I hold tight to a saying an old bible teacher said once, “Pray, obey, repeat”. These nuggets of truth are my inspiration. I am never going to be perfect. No matter what the mistakes I made yesterday or today, I have hope for a better tomorrow. "<br /> <br />Hope, girls! That's what it is all about. That is why we are doing this. Hope in a God who can make us better. Hope in He who is powerful enough to change our circumstances drastically, but wise enough to grow us through them. Hope that our lives will make a difference in those around us. And hope in the eternal life that awaits us with brilliance. Maybe that's why the saying goes, "Hope springs eternal." <br /> <br />Proverbs 15: The Tongue...<br /> <br />Yes, we're back to this topic after Proverbs 13. But I think, again, our words impact our world so much! <br /> <br />1 A gentle answer deflects anger,<br /> but harsh words make tempers flare.<br /> <br />**My Study Bible just said, "Have you ever tried to argue in a whisper? It is equally hard to argue with someone who insists on answering gently. On the other hand, a rising voice and harsh words almost always trigger an angry response. To turn away wrath and seek peace, choose gentle words." <br /> <br />So true! To take it one step farther, why do we argue? Most of the time it's because we're trying to make our point known. But if we can't convey that point without bringing on a fight with our spouse, then we need to sit back and wait. Wait until that urge goes away and we can have self-control when discussing the issue. <br /><br />2 The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing,<br /> but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness.<br /> <br />**We have the ability to make His knowledge, His words appealing to others through the words WE choose. How's that for powerful? If we choose the right words, it draws others to want to know Him. I don't think we ever want to get in the way of that. And what if those others were our children? <br /><br />4 Gentle words are a tree of life;<br /> a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.<br /><br />23 Everyone enjoys a fitting reply;<br /> it is wonderful to say the right thing at the right time!<br /> <br />**And we know when we've actually done this. You can feel it all the way down to your soul. Why we don't do the all the time? I believe it all roots back to selfishness (included in that is pride, arrogance, overbearingness, control, even unbridled sadness for no comprehensive reason...just being sad for attention).<br /><br />28 The heart of the godly thinks carefully before speaking;<br /> the mouth of the wicked overflows with evil words.<br /> <br />**Key word..."thinks." What mountains we would move if we just thought about what came out of our mouth and really examined those words closely? Seriously! Like an arrow to my heart! <br /> <br />In my study Bible it gives the following definition of the Four Tongues:<br /> <br />1. The Controlled Tongue: Those with this speech pattern thing before speaking, know when silence is best, and give wise advise.<br /> <br />2. The Caring Tongue: Those that speak truthfully while seeking to encourage.<br /> <br />3. The Conniving Tongue: Those that are filled with wrong motives, gossip, slander, and a desire to twist truth.<br /> <br />4. The Careless Tongue: These are filled with lies, curses, quick-tempered words, which can lead to rebellion and destruction. <br /> <br />This weekend think about which tongue you will enable as you deal particularly with your hubby and kiddos. I will do the same...<br /> <br />If there has been wrong done because of your words this week, then seek to resolve those issues before Sunday. <br /> <br />Remember, being "right" does not always lead to happiness, peace, or joy. My need to be right can destroy my home, my marriage, my relationships. Instead, seek to reconcile with your "person of interest" and put their interests higher than your own. This is a challenge for me because I definitely have some humble apologies to make to the ones I love. Too bad my words aren't always loving! <br /> <br />Much love mamas!!<br /> <br />Have a great weekend! "See" you Monday! <br /> <br />RLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2584515097837683596.post-53126931853467122392010-01-14T16:50:00.000-08:002010-03-07T16:52:16.495-08:00Never AloneOh, My Lovely and Gracious, Honest and Godly Friends:<br /> <br />I love, love, love hearing from you! For your words bless my heart more than you know! The biggest lesson learned is that, as sisters in Christ, we are all fighting for the same thing for the same reason for the glory of Him who controls all things. <br /> <br />You are NOT alone. Not ever. For the One who created you surrounds you at all times, and the body of Christ does the same. We gather around one another, pray, and support in any way possible. <br /> <br />I've made the below contributions anonymous so you feel free to share anytime. Thanks Ladies for the quotes below! <br /> <br />Easier said than done...<br />Filter...<br />Restraint...<br />Breathe...<br />Filter...<br />This is me today...<br /> <br /> This is a tough place for me. I am learning to EAT my words quickly. Shove them back down your mouth without uttering a sound. It does pay off. I have been quietly just accepting things he does or says without comment. Also trying not to give BODY LANGUAGE either. After one month of doing this and having watched Fireproof, I received a beautiful Christmas Card from him --- it really does work. Now just to keep it up !! <br /> <br />I really needed to hear this....I have been speaking to my husband and kids in a horrible fashion! I am working on thinking a bit before I speak...its not easy for me I tend to flip on everything!! I could use a lot of prayer in this area...it is impossible to do it on my own, but with God all things are possible! <br /> <br />It’s funny that I didn’t specifically make a resolution, but as the new year unfolded I found myself trying to prioritize things a bit differently. Reading Proverbs has led me to move many things I already know from the back of my brain to the front of my brain where I can put them to use much quicker. I finished reading a book called, “Have a Little Faith,” by Mitch Albom and even though it doesn’t seem like much it’s a huge accomplishment because I start books all the time and don’t find the time to finish them. The cool thing is that by taking a little time for myself to read and reflect I’m finding that I’m checking in with God throughout my day. For example when I’m feeling frazzled, you know that moment just before everything starts to get out of hand, I’m able to be aware of what’s happening and ask God for help. It’s usually at that moment that my whole perspective changes and then things become more manageable. Reading Proverbs is challenging me to live God’s way, and the number one most important thing is that it is His way and not my way. I’m so thankful and humbled by this.<br /> <br />What a kick in the kiester. My mouth and my words are such a daily struggle. I feel like my heart is so ugly. It's horrifying. I have been yelling at the kids all day... underlying issues... too many to list. I feel the weight of this ugliness in my heart and wondered when it happened. It's not who I am or what I want to be. I feel like my heart is SO HARD that there is no way that God can even penetrate it. I have been seeking, trying to pray, and yet, my life remains the same. I read your words about actually acting and making changes but feel so lost in the struggle I can't seem to find the way out. It's so my desire. I want my kids to feel loved, blessed and to have a mom that has wise, strong words of encouragement and love, not sharp words of frustration that make them feel like crap. IDK what to do. My heart is seriously seeking right now. I so praise God for giving me my husband who in my struggle sees my humanness and stress and understands. He listens and thoughtfully processes my needs and how to help me through them. He's more than I deserve at this point. <br /><br /> <br />So, here's Proverbs 14 tid-bit:<br /> <br />6 A mocker seeks wisdom and never finds it,<br /> but knowledge comes easily to those with understanding.<br /><br />Ladies...YOU are NOT mockers. For you understand. (The Greek root for this understand is to discern or consider.) You understand the truth. You understand the God we serve. You are rooted in HIs Word, and your heart and soul belong to Him. <br /> <br />So therefore the knowledge (Gr: perception, skill, wisdom) of Him and His words transforms our lives, because we UNDERSTAND. <br /> <br />It's not about the destination. It's not about being perfect. It's not about reaching the goal. <br /> <br />Instead it's all about the journey, the refinement in our daily walk, and running the race. <br /> <br />Philippians 2:16<br />Hold firmly to the word of life; then, on the day of Christ's return, I will be proud that I did not run the race in vain and that my work was not useless.<br /> <br />So, ladies, just focus on today. Go get new "running shoes", tune your ipod to Him, grab a running partner, and get moving. For it's all about baby steps! <br /> <br />Much much love! <br /> <br />RebeccaLivvy Bloomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01373123117630607467noreply@blogger.com0