Choose Your Words Wisely

Hey Mama Friends!

Happy Hump Day...Wednesday, I mean! It's all downhill from here!

Can you believe January is almost 1/2 done? How are you doing on your resolutions? Any successes you want to share? Anything you've learned during this two week period of time?

We're all on this amazing journey called life...and we're all learning different things at once. I think it would be amazingly encouraging to hear what God is doing in your life! Just email me back and I'll compile everyone's answers and email them out tomorrow. Such fun! :)

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Proverbs 13.

I'll keep this one short since there is one verse that deserve a little time spent processing and applying it today, especially as women.

v3 Those who control their tongue will have a long life; a quick retort can ruin everything.

Easier read, than done. Actually easier wished for, easier desired, easier forgotten, than done. And done consistently.

No matter how many scented candles we burn, cookies we bake, decor we hang up, the bottom line is it is our words that determines the emotional atmosphere of our home.

See, words are simply an outward expression of the chaos and havoc that reign supreme in our hearts and minds. Eventually, if you do not examine your thoughts and refine them under His magnifying glass, they will come out as words. And when they do, most of the time the grief caused is really not worth the words in the first place.

How wise Solomon was to write: "a quick retort can ruin EVERYTHING." Everything. Just not some things...but absolutely everything.

I've actually been on a date with Cliff and with one fell swoop of a negative or condescending comment from me, I can actually ruin the entire night. And I do mean entire night...

For those words then have a ripple affect, and the repercussions can go on and on and on even for days if we let our pride get in the way of making things right. Those words determine how others react back to us, in words and in deeds...and if left unhealed, those words can destroy the future relationship, as well as leave negative memories in the past.

It's exhausting to think that every day we have to possibility of impacting the future through our relationship with our husband, our example to our children, and then in our children's lives just by choosing our words wisely.

(I love in the movie Ever After with Drew Barrymore, the queen tells the wicked stepmother, "Choose your words wisely, for they may be your last.")

But instead of seeing it exhausting, see it as freeing. Every moment, every hour, every day, we have the possibility of making someone light up with our words. We have the possibility of molding our child's memories into ones of happiness and peace. We have the opportunity to build up our marriage and our husband through our encouraging and gentle words. And how amazing is that?

Today, before you say something negative or critical, try putting it through the filter of the following:

1. Am I truly ticked/hurt about this one event, or is there an underlying reason for feeling this way that I should address instead? (Don't critique the dishes if you're really feeling unloved.)

2. Is this a mountain or a molehill? Is this worth dying for? (Sometimes I don't say anything, pretending it's a molehill, and then three weeks later it's a mountain because I've hung onto it. If you've determined at this moment it's a molehill, then LET IT GO!!)

3. If someone was coming to me with this same concern, how would I receive it best? (Yelling and arguing are usually not the way to "move" a person emotionally.)

4. And once, filtered, and you've determined what you're going to say and how you're going to say it, then WAIT for the right time. Wait for the kiddos to be occupied, wait for the stress of work to dissipate, wait for the distractions to go away...you'll know when. Promise!

In Titus 2 yesterday, Pastor David Hegg said, "You built the spouse you have." (Just like, you have the kind of kids you spent molding.)

Like an arrow to my perfect wife bubble, "pop" went all I thought was true...and my world just turned upside down. For how Cliff responds to me is largely based on how and with what words I engage him. That's food for thought!

So, my friends. Words. Check them today as you enter into conversation with your family...and may He calm your mind, take your worry, encourage your walk, and give you the strength to succeed just for today.

Love!

Rebecca